Even Though I Loved You First

‘It’s only a matter of time until we get together’.

Yes, that was the theory that he, Kei Ichinose, has been holding to, all these years.

He always thought that, there will eventually come a time, when the two of them could intimately hold hands—

—a time where both of them could be happy just by being with each other, and even though it was somewhat true.

It was never what Kei looked for.

He wanted to be the sole reason for her smile, to be the one who could cry with her at her lowest, and could smile with her at her highest.

However, even though such thoughts invaded Kei… 

He wasn’t chosen.

Those were his thoughts towards his childhood friend.

That was his reason for trying his best everyday.

That was his reason for the ‘Kei’ he was.

Yes… That was his way of interpreting what people call love…

Storge: Platonic Love

Agape: Selfless Love

Philia: Friendly or Equal Love

And finally… what he thought back then, he yearned the most…

‘Eros: Romantic Love’

  However, he couldn’t help but also think about…

‘Mania: Obsessive Love’

Did he fall in love with her because he was afraid of being lonely? 

Did he fall in love with her because of her personality?

Was it love…? Or was it an obsession…?

Kei’s mind was in total chaos.

He knew…

He knew that his love for Shizuka wasn’t a joke…

He knew that what he felt surely was love…

Yet, due to everything that happened… seeing someone who seemed so close to him… suddenly seem so far away…

Made him unable to think straight. To think things that didn’t make sense…

That was Kei Ichinose, someone who just got heartbroken by his first love.

Who never knew what it really meant to experience the normal way in which love usually went.

Until ‘that day’, he woke up to reality and realized…

No matter how much you try to give an appeal, no matter how much you throw them indirect hints…

If you never revealed your true feelings, in hopes that the other party will make the move on you, then you weren’t qualified for what real-life-love really meant…

For Kei, when it came to love—

—being patient and overly optimistic—

—was the first mistake he made.