Aristocrat (HP/SI)

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***

Richie decided to hurry everyone up. He pointed his wand at the owl and non-verbally sent an Immobulus spell at it. The bird tried to take off, but the blue beam still hit it.

- Guys, let's grab the owl and get out of here. We'll deal with this later.

- Yeah, yeah, let's go," Ron agreed hastily.

- Yeah, yeah, yeah? - Harry glared at Ron. - It's your owl, you take it.

- It's not my owl, it's Malfoy's!

Ron, finding no support, sighed heavily and headed towards the bird. He put the owl away in his bag and walked back to the boys.

Richie climbed into his robotic armour. Harry followed his mate's example and climbed into his spacesuit. Ron hurried to take the last spacesuit. Heading towards the wall of black flame, the boys froze for a moment beside the ZOTI professor's body.

Harry turned his head towards Ron and said with a hysterical and sarcastic tone:

- We're not going to make it out of detention, are we?! I don't want to go to Azkaban....

- Who knew we'd have to fail a teacher," Weasley swallowed convulsively, looking away from the corpse. - And anyway, we're heroes - we destroyed the greatest wizarding evil of all - You-Know-Who..." he added uncertainly.

- Ron, don't exaggerate," Richard grumbled. - First of all, it was self-defence, and Quirrell killed himself. Secondly, a mad professor is not the greatest of evils. I doubt it was Tom Riddle. More likely, Professor Quirrell had a Siamese twin in the back of his head who went insane and thought he was Riddle, and with him, Quirrell himself went insane. Such Siamese twins are rare and usually die in infancy, but Quirrell is a wizard, he could have survived.

- I'd go mad too if I had a turban on all the time," Potter said.

- You think so? - stretched out Weasley. - What about the screaming ghost and Harry's scar?! Harry's scar was left by You-Know-Who. Harry's scar hurt when Sammy-Knows-Who was around, and it stopped hurting when the ghost left. I think there's a connection.

- If you think about it..." Richie thought for a moment. - Magic can do anything. But then it would seem that Riddle wasn't completely dead in eighty-one, but turned into a ghost. And he'd somehow got into Quirrell's body. And he needed the Philosopher's Stone to get his body. So the trap was set by Dumbledore specifically for him.

- Or not a trap," Harry's face looked frowning behind the transparent shield of his spacesuit.

- What is it then? - Weasley asked.

- 'Perhaps Headmaster Dumbledore,' Harry continued, 'wanted to revive Voldemort.

At the mention of Riddle's nickname, Ron twitched.

- 'Dumbledore is no saint, but why would he want to revive a rival? - He asked.

- 'I don't know,' Potter shrugged. - It's just that I thought there seemed to be traps, but look at it this way - we three first-years were able to get through them. Albeit the best and best equipped, but still first-years. It was like Quirrell was specifically told, "Hey, mate, I've got a Philosopher's Stone in my basement. It needs to be protected, and you're going to do it with the other teachers. To know what traps are being used, you'll set yours penultimate."

- But then why not have Quirrell do the last trap? - Weasley asked a perfectly logical question.

- So as not to alert the thief," Potter replied. - To dull his vigilance. To make him think he's stealing the stone himself, rather than receiving it as a gift.

During the conversation, the boys had crossed both walls of fire and crossed the hall with the unconscious troll. In order to be in the next hall, they had to take off. Thankfully, all the costumes supported the levitation function.

The three boys flew over the chess pieces and crawled into the hall with the keys through the hole left in the wall.

- I still don't understand why the Headmaster would revive You-Know-Who," Ron continued.

- Maybe he wanted more glory," Harry suggested. - He could have killed him after he was revived. Everyone would have respected and loved him more than before. And what reason does a madman need?!

- No, Dumbledore's a bit of a weirdo, but he's not crazy," Weasley said.

- Ron, he's a complete lunatic! - Harry said confidently. - I read the report from the Muggle forensic psychiatrist my uncle consulted. It says in black and white that Dumbledore is insane.

- Oh!" Ron exclaimed in amazement. - I see.

- Quiet, boys," Richard said. - Switch to the intercom. You'll need to wish the external vocoders to switch off. We're approaching the plant tentacles.

- I don't want to go to them, even in costume," Ron said, frozen in place.

- We're not idiots to walk," said Richie. - We're taking off again. Quietly.

The boys squeezed through the hatch. To their great joy, the Cerberus was still asleep.

Harry reached the door, climbed out of his spacesuit. Then Ron did the same next to him. Last to go was Richie. All the spacesuits were reduced and removed.

- Activate stealth mode," Richard whispered.

- What?" Weasley stared at Grosvenor in bewilderment.

- Become invisible," Richie explained.

- А! You should have said so.

The boys put on their thermal imaging goggles and turned invisible.

Before the boys could sneak to the end of the corridor, Professor McGonagall suddenly appeared at the beginning of the corridor.

Harry, Ron and Richie pressed themselves against the wall and held their breath. The professor hurried past them. She pulled the handle on the door and was surprised to find it unlocked.

Looking inside, McGonagall stared dumbfounded at the sleeping Cerberus.

- Oh! Is that so..." she exclaimed loudly in amazement.

The professor promptly slammed the door shut. Her wand was in her hand. In the same instant she cast a cascade of various spells on the door, whereupon the boys watched McGonagall run for the first time in amazement.

Richie took a breath of relief as the professor ran past them without noticing the invisibles and disappeared around the corner of the corridor.- It's gone," Ron exhaled with a huge sigh of relief.

- God, I thought she was going to spot us," Harry said.

- We've got to get out of here," Richard said. - I'm sure McGonagall has gone to get help.

- Let's go!

Ron didn't wait and sprinted after his exclamation. Harry and Richard ran after him, barely keeping up.

It wasn't until they reached the corridor of the one-eyed witch that the boys stopped.

Breathing hoarsely, Richie reached into his bag for his walkie-talkie. Pushing the button on the side of the woki-toki, he brought the device to his mouth and spoke:

- Assemble on point. Repeat, rendezvous at the point.

The radio hissed. The signal in the stone castle was poorly received, even by a powerful portable army radio transmitter. But in the midst of the hissing it was possible to make out the words spoken in Ronald Weasley's voice:

- Copy. Proceeding to the point.

The boys were still reeling from the run and the adventure. They were overwhelmed with emotion: excitement, fear, worry, apprehension, they were excited and agitated.

- 'Guys,' Richard began, 'I think we need to agree on what has happened.

- Yes?" was said by a reddish-yellow blur that Harry Potter could see through his thermal imaging goggles.

- Everything that was at Hogwarts should stay at Hogwarts," Richard added.

- I agree," Ron blurted out. - We must never tell anyone about what happened. I don't know about you, but I don't want to go to Azkaban. They say it's really bad there.

- Of course it is! Of course it's a secret! - Harry said with slight indignation. - But shouldn't we tell everyone about Voldemort's return?

- Are you out of your mind?! - Richard frowned, though his comrades couldn't see it through the thermal imaging cameras. - Who's going to believe us? From the outside it looks as if we were trying to steal a valuable artefact, and the disabled professor, shyly hiding his Siamese twin, was trying to stop the criminals. And we, being the bad guys we are, committed a felony by criminal conspiracy - we murdered a teacher with an unforgivable spell and accused him of being possessed by Tom Riddle, who everyone thinks is dead.

- Hmm... Yeah, I don't think they'll believe us," Weasley agreed. - But I have a suggestion.

- What is it? - Harry asked.

- Let's beat up Fred and George!

- Ron, what are you doing?! - Harry was utterly astonished. - They're your brothers.

- So what? - Ron replied. - If they hadn't screwed up, we wouldn't have had to face Quirrell.

- That's not a bad idea," Richard said thoughtfully, "but... I still think it was a force majeure. Fred and George were counting on apprehending the ordinary wizard that Quirrell seemed to be. Who knew Riddle's ghost would be there too?

- So we won't tell anyone about Voldemort? - Harry asked.

- No, of course not! - Ron answered him. - Harry, don't even think about it. I don't want to end up behind bars because of it.

- All right, boys," Harry sighed heavily. - Everything that was at Hogwarts will stay at Hogwarts.

The boys only had to wait a couple of minutes for what seemed like an hour. Soon a trio of doppelgangers appeared in the corridor of the one-eyed witch. When they reached the statue, Richie furtively looked around and, finding no one else, said quietly:

- We're in stealth mode here.

You had to hand it to the elite special forces for their stamina. They only twitched in the direction of the voice. At that moment, however, their hands were making grasping motions, as if the men were trying to grab for weapons.

- Sir," the Weasley doppelganger said quietly, "we await further instructions.

- I'll open the passage and you dive right in. You too," Richard turned to Harry and Ron.

Soon the boys and their doppelgangers were inside the secret passage. Richie dropped the invisibility. Ron and Harry followed.

- Get changed and go to the cluster of students to provide an alibi," Richard said to Potter and Weasley. - 'And I'll walk my mates to the exit.

- Richie, are you sure you don't need any help? - Harry asked worriedly.

- No thanks," Grosvenor shook his head sideways.

Harry and Ron began to change rather quickly. Richie kept up with them - he was quickly getting his appearance in perfect order.

- How did it go? - Grosvenor asked the SWAT team.

- Sir," the Weasley lookalike began, "as you said, we proceeded to a cluster of students. The best place to do so turned out to be the street. We tried to stay in full view of the other students, but at the same time not get too close to them. Unfortunately, one unpleasant situation occurred.

- What was it? - Richard frowned, taking a break from brushing his hair.

- A group of students approached us, sir," the Weasley lookalike continued. - Four boys, all around twelve years old. All of them have patches on their robes with the distinctive snake insignia and the word 'Slytherin' on them, and green ties. The leader was a white-haired, thin, arrogant boor. Two burly boys and one skinny black-haired boy as a support group.

- Malfoy, Crabbe, Goyle, and Nott," Ron said dismissively. - What did those slugs want with us?

- Sir? - Ron's doppelganger looked questioningly at Grosvenor, as if asking for permission to answer or not.

- I'm curious to know the answer to that question, too," Richard nodded affirmatively.

- Sir, those boys, or rather the white-haired one, have been insulting me," the Weasley lookalike continued. - We managed to ignore him for a while, but then the boy started hurling strong insults at the Weasley family, which is supposed to be mine. I understood that if I didn't respond to this, we would fail the legend and ruin your reputation.

- Malfoy... What an arsehole! - Ron exclaimed indignantly.

- What did you do? - Richard asked the soldier.

- Fucked them up, sir!

- Ah, fucked them," said Richie calmly. - That's good.

- That's what they should have done! - Ron exclaimed happily, with a hint of gloating. - They'll know how to insult my family, you filthy slugs!

- I hope you won't get in trouble for this, sir. - Grosvenor was asked with a slight concern by the soldier impersonating Ron. - We tried to hit gently, but painfully, so as not to cause serious injuries or leave marks.

- It's all right, lads," said Richard. - On the contrary, it's even better. A lot of people must have seen the fight, and that's an alibi.

- Sir, I wouldn't call it a fight," the Weasley doppelganger grimaced slightly. - It was more like beating babies. But we did have a lot of students watching us.

- Ron, Harry, you should go," Richard addressed the boys.

- Ron, let's go," Potter called after his friend.

Ron reluctantly walked towards the tunnel exit. He would have loved to hear the full story of his doppelganger beating up the hated Malfoy.

Richard put the ninja suits away in his bag. Ron and Harry walked out of the secret passage into the corridor of the one-eyed witch.

- How much time is left until the end of the change of appearance special? - Richard asked.

Ron's doppelganger glanced at his watch, then answered:

- Seven minutes, sir.

- In that case, let's go to your things and wait for the compound to wear off," Richie began to order. He took the bag off his shoulder and handed it to the redhead. - You are to deliver this special cargo safely to the Duke of Westminster and hand it to him personally. The special cargo is not to be opened, not to be lost. It can be handled safely - it is not afraid of shaking or falling.

- We have a special cargo to deliver, sir," the Weasley double saluted in a military manner. - What should we tell the commanding officer?

- You can tell them that your operation was a success, and we'll discuss the rest in person with your handler. I'm pleased with you guys. I hope you weren't too frightened by the atmosphere in the castle.

- It's all right, sir," the Potter lookalike said. - We all grew up in wizarding families until we were eleven, and we all dreamed of going to Hogwarts. You could say our dream came true. Not quite as we'd hoped, though.

- The ghosts, though..." Richard's doppelganger said quietly. - I almost shit myself when I saw them.

- Yeah," Ron's doppelganger agreed. - Fuck such meetings...

The reversal potion had stopped working. The boys' doppelgangers began to turn into grown, strong men. It was a good thing for them that the soldiers had managed to undress in time, as they had been keeping a close eye on the time. They quickly donned their uniforms and armed themselves.

Richie opened the passageway to the basement of the Sweet Kingdom and stalled in front of the door leading from the basement to the street. Usually the lock opening spell was used by Harry Potter, and Richie hadn't bothered to learn those charms.

- Sir, may I...

The Special Forces officer who had been posing as Ron before realised the boy's predicament and pulled him aside. He took out a set of lock picks from the pocket of his uniform and opened the lock in a matter of seconds.

Richard was shocked, for it had taken the military man only a little longer to pick than it had taken Harry with charms.

The soldiers negotiated quietly over the walkie-talkies with their colleagues who were ambushing them outside. After that, they quickly left the basement and seemed to disappear down the end of the alley.

Richie hurried back to Hogwarts.

In the one-eyed witch's corridor, Richie looked around and found no one. He called Harry on the magophone.

- 'Richie, hello,' Potter answered promptly.

- Where are you?

- 'Listen, we're in the Weasley twins' lab. Do you know where that is?

- I do. Harry, did you actually go and beat them up?

- What?!" Potter replied in surprise. - No! No, we asked them to make us laxatives.

- You?!

- Well, owl-" Harry whispered.

- 'Ahhhh, owl-e...' Richard stretched out understandingly. - I see. Then I'll go as an extra. Where and when do we meet?

- Fred promised that the potion would be ready in twenty minutes. I suggest we meet... Erm..." Harry sounded confused. - I don't know.

- I suggest we meet on the ground floor of the North Tower," Richard said.

- Why there? - Harry asked.

Richard replied:

- Firstly, the North Tower is far away from all the dormitories and main routes. It's a ten minute walk from the Great Hall, so not many people ever go there. Students won't even consider going there. Secondly, there are no live portraits there. Third, on the top floor of the tower is the Divination Room, from which, according to rumours from upperclassmen, the teacher hardly ever goes anywhere. Follow my logic: students only go there for classes, hence the teachers and Filch are not patrolling there, and Trelawney sits in her den without a trace. It would be hard to find a more private place for private meetings.

- All right," Harry agreed. - Then meet me there by the ground floor stairwell in about forty minutes.

Richie went outside and immediately spotted Justin Finch-Fletchley, who also saw his mate and waved. Justin was in company with Ernie McMillan.

- How's it going, Jas? - Richard came up to his classmates.

- Boring compared to you," replied Finch-Fletchley. - Ernie told me about your fight with the Slytherins.

- It was awesome! - Macmillan said admiringly. - I didn't know Ron could fight like that. He knocked out Crabbe and Goyle so well, and then, uh... I was afraid when Malfoy pulled out his wand, but you twisted his arm so well and knocked his wand out! Richie, can you teach me that move?

- I'd love to," Richard smiled guiltily, "but, Ernie, the problem is that I don't know it myself. It all came out of nowhere. The danger, the adrenaline in the blood... I can show you a couple of fencing tricks.

- That's not bad either," MacMillan said, not the least bit upset.

- Richie, what did the snakes want from you anyway? - Justin asked.

- They were just looking for a fight," Richard said nonchalantly. - They came up to us, and Malfoy immediately started insulting Ron. We tolerated it for a while, but then Malfoy got out of line. I had to show those upstarts that you have to take responsibility for what you say.

- Right! - MacMillan agreed. - I wanted to help you. I rushed over when I saw that there were four Slytherins and three of you, but then I realised that my help wasn't needed.

- If you'll excuse me," Richard said after looking at his watch, "I have an important business meeting. I'll meet you at the hostel.

Richard's gaze slid from the face of the watch to the back of his left hand, closer to his forearm. He rounded his eyes in amazement to find a small burn in the form of a horizontal line, from which two more lines ran at a forty-five-degree angle.

Richard remembered the rune alphabet that Madame Marchbanks had been hammering into his head for a month while he was practising his charms. The burn seemed sloppy, but it looked a lot like the Feo rune.

Before the quest for the Philosopher's Stone, there had been nothing similar on his hand. The only time this burn could have appeared was when Richie was batting Avada back at Quirrell with his light blade. That's when sparks flew out to the sides, apparently one or more had hit his left arm.

Come to think of it, Richard had taken the sparks from the deadly spell on his hand. The only person who survived the Avada hit was Harry Potter. He has a scar on his forehead, which, by the way, looks a lot like the Sigil rune, aka Saul. Only sparks from the spell hit Richie, which is probably why the wound is much smaller and he didn't die.

Due to the stress and adrenaline in his blood, Richard still felt no pain, but as soon as he noticed the wound, he felt itchy and a little sore.

With difficulty tearing his gaze away from the burn, Richie set off towards the North Tower.

Along the way, Grosvenor Jr. kept thinking about the burn. He couldn't understand why it was in the shape of a rune. Was it a standard reaction of magic to a reflected death spell or just a coincidence?

Halfway through the journey, Richard's mind cleared a little, and he remembered that any wound should be treated, even if it seemed insignificant. He remembered the hygiene lectures he'd had at school in his past life, where the teachers used to scare the students with scary stories like, "This one guy stepped on a nail and thought it would heal on its own, and then they cut off his leg.

It's been years since primary school, it's a different life, but the compulsion works. Richie froze and reached into his bag... But his hand felt empty. The bag was not in its usual place, for Richard had handed it to the squib soldier a little over half an hour ago. Perhaps he'd overreacted, but better to be safe than sorry. What if the headmaster did a mass search, for example, at night with the help of house elves? And in the bag, what a surprise, the Philosopher's Stone and the tools with which it was stolen!

The corridor of the ground floor of the tower near the staircase was empty. For a moment Richard thought that a shadow flashed behind him. The boy froze and peered down the corridor, but saw and heard nothing. The torches gave uneven shadows, so Richie wrote it all off.

Soon there were footsteps on the stairs, and Harry and Ron appeared.

- No one's here," Harry said, looking around.

- I suggest we find an empty office," Richard suggested.

- That's a good idea. - Ron agreed.

The boys walked down the corridor and started pulling the door handles. The second office from the staircase was unlocked. It was dusty inside, with old, half-rotten desks. It seemed that if you sneezed on them, they would fall apart.

The boys went into the office and closed the door. Ritchie immediately used his wand: cleaning spells removed the dust in a couple of minutes, and levitation helped to move the desks to the wall. Not all of the old furniture survived the transport, however - some of the desks fell apart in the process.

By the time Richard had finished cleaning up, Ron had already taken the owl out of his bag and Harry had prepared a potion.

The owl regained consciousness and tried to break free of Ron's steel grip. It stared in horror at Harry approaching and tried to peck him. But Ron caught the owl's head with his left hand and deftly inserted a pre-prepared wooden spacer into its beak. Harry poured the potion down the bird's throat, spilling most of it.

Richard watched the whole thing with concealed horror. It would have been better for him to let the owl go free and supposedly lose the Philosopher's Stone. He didn't want to set the boys up. It was better to blame the owl for the loss of the stone. Richard's fevered imagination gave him the idea of using a cancellation spell on the owl, and of making the boys think that eating the owl would spoil the Philosopher's Stone. It was a pity for the bird, of course, but it was a small loss.

- Boys," Richard began, drawing Harry and Ron's attention to him, "I've been thinking: we don't know anything about the properties of the Philosopher's Stone... Maybe the stomach juices could spoil it. Or maybe it could digest in the owl like a hamburger. And there's no telling what will happen after that. Maybe the bird dies or becomes immortal. Or maybe some obscure magical reaction will take place.

Harry glanced at Richard for a moment, then watched the owl carefully.

- As long as the stone is intact," he said hopefully.

- I hope you're wrong, Richie," Ron muttered.

Weasley was tired of holding on to the owl, which continued to lash out and try to peck him. Especially since he knew exactly what was going to happen after taking the laxative potion, and he didn't want to ruin his robes in bird droppings.

- Harry, tie her up," he said.

- With what?" Potter looked around in bewilderment.

- I've got scotch tape in my left pocket," Weasley replied.

Harry took the duct tape out of Ron's robe pocket and with great difficulty tied the owl's wings to its body. He tied the paws together at the same time.

After that Ron laid the owl down on the floor with relief.

Harry tilted his head to the side and looked at the bird closely.

- Um, Ron," he said, "how's it going to shit lying down? Do you think birds can do that?

- What am I, an ornithologist? - Ron said indignantly. - How am I supposed to know how birds shit?!

Richard, who had been watching, wanted to put his right palm to his face.

- Put it on your feet," he suggested.

- How?" exclaimed Harry. - Her paws are tied together!

- And you make supports," Richie nodded at the pile of junk that had just before been old desks. - There's plenty of material. If only you had the will...

- Ritchie's got a point," Ron said, and then went off to gather up some boards and splinters.

Harry and Ron used the old junk to build a monstrous structure of leaning poles that supported the owl on all sides. Ron had even thought of transfiguring the whole thing and strengthening it so that the flimsy structure wouldn't fall apart. The owl was held by the centre of the owl's body and supported by three sloping poles.

Ron and Harry stared at the owl with giddy anticipation.

Richie took in a chestful of air and thought:

"The bird is a pity, but its sacrifice will not be in vain."

He furtively pulled out his wand and pointed it at the owl from behind his mates. From the wand came an invisible cancellation spell in an amplified version (Finita Maxima). It was one of the spells that Richard had been taught by Madame Marchbanks. She insisted that this spell should be learnt not only non-verbally, but also in the wandless version.

The enchantment had no visual effect, but Richie was sure the spell must have worked. He hastily stashed the magic tool in a pouch on his belt. No one noticed his actions.

- When is she going to shit herself?! - Ron exclaimed impatiently.

- Now, come on, squeeze the maggot out! - Harry said excitedly, like a fan chanting a cheer for his team.

Suddenly, for the three boys, Draco Malfoy's hysterical and utterly outraged scream sounded behind them:

- Sick perverts, what are you doing to my owl!

Complete silence hung in the room. Richie, Ron and Harry turned heavily astonished faces and found Malfoy in the open doorway. Draco was staring at his owl with an ineffable mixture of surprise, anger and indignation with huge eyes.The picture that came into view was unbelievable: the scotch-bound bird was inside an incomprehensible structure that resembled a mine for setting off fireworks. At the same time, his three foes are not taking their gaze off the owl, and two of them are waiting with anticipation for the bird to lay its larvae.

- Psychos! - Draco whispered with a look of horror on his face. - You're completely sick in the head... It wasn't enough for you to beat me up, you've kidnapped my bird and are mocking it! What the bloody hell is going on here?!

- Erm..." Harry said with a confused look. - 'Malfoy, it's not what you think...'

- What was I thinking?! - Draco exploded with indignation. - 'You should be isolated from society! You're brain-dead perverts who like to watch birds shit!!! I'll report you to Professor Snape and my father.

- Does anyone know how to erase memories? - Richard's question, asked in a calm tone, came out of the blue.

- No," Ron answered with great regret.

- 'No,' Harry shook his head negatively to the side.

Draco, eyeing the trio of boys warily, backed away.

- You want to erase my memory too?! - he grimaced.

- I'm sorry, but it won't work," Richard said sadly.

- I'll take my owl," Draco suddenly found the courage to exclaim. - And if you dare to stop me, my father will find out and you'll be in trouble!

- I won't! - Harry exclaimed and stood in Malfoy's way.

- We have your bird as a hostage! - Ron exclaimed. - We'll get it back if you just get the hell out of here and don't tell your teachers anything.

- Draco, I'm sorry, I think we overstepped the mark," Richard said. - We'll give you the owl.

- Richie, what are you doing?! - Harry looked at Grosvenor in amazement. - What about..." He showed a ball the size of a football, referring to the Philosopher's Stone but exaggerating its size a little.

- We'll give it to you," Richard said with pressure. - But not now! Draco, we want to make sure we don't get punished on your tip-off. Perhaps Ron was being overly harsh. Let us cure your bird and bring it back tonight.

- No way! I'll take it now.

It's unclear where Draco got the courage from, but he determinedly rushed past a dazed Harry and Ron to his bird, grabbed it and pulled it up.

At that moment, what Weasley and Potter had been waiting for so eagerly happened. Except that the reaction was much stronger than one would have expected. In the owl's intestines, the fake Philosopher's Stone had turned to dry ice after Richard had used Finite. It reacted violently and began to release carbon dioxide at a high rate. It accumulated in his guts, slowly bloating the owl and chilling his internal organs. And then there was the horse dose of a powerful laxative from the Weasley twins' signature modified recipe. And the moment Malfoy disturbed the owl, a stream of icy exhaust burst out of it in a powerful jet.

The owl took off from such a jet, even with its wings bound. Draco struggled to hold the bird in his outstretched arms. The splattered fine bird droppings flew straight at him, covering Malfoy from head to toe. It was worth noting that it looked very magical, like snowflakes in a hard frost that sparkled in the sunlight. Frosty white sequins of bird droppings adorned Draco's hair, face and robes.

Harry and Ron's faces stretched at such a sight. Ron's mouth fell open and he couldn't take his eyes off Draco and the owl. Harry, unable to believe his eyes, wiped his glasses.

- 'Richie,' Ron said quietly, 'you were right... It's amazing what a weird magical reaction this is...'

- That's it, it's gone," Harry said sadly, referring to the Philosopher's Stone.

Draco was dumbfounded, he froze motionless and resembled a statue of a dumbfounded boy wizard that had been "loved" by pigeons.

- Guys," Richard said, "we need to treat the owl, or it will drop its legs! Do you have any potions?

Ronald quickly orientated himself and went into his bag.

- I have a few healing potions," he replied. - Somewhere in here, just a second.

Weasley pulled out several vials of potions with a look of triumph and exclaimed:

- 'Harry, get the owl over here, we'll treat it.

Potter rushed over to Malfoy and took the barely alive owl from his stiffened hands.

As Ron began to pour one potion after another into the owl's beak, Draco woke up and tried to shake off the frosty droppings in disgust.

- Hey!" he exclaimed indignantly in a quiet, tired voice as he looked at Harry and Ron. - Haven't you been bullied enough? Are you trying to kill my bird?

- On the contrary, we're trying to cure it," Harry replied.

The magic potions were really helping - it was evident by the owl, which began to twitch its legs and wings. Harry started to free the bird from the duct tape, but pulled it off, along with the feathers. The owl was too exhausted to make a voice, it only wheezed in pain. But the potions made it grow new feathers, and it looked much better after all the abuse, almost as good as it had at the beginning.

- Ron, how did you get so many healing potions? - Richard asked.

- It's all because of the twins," Weasley replied. - You never know what kind of crap they're going to slip you. So I took some precautions. I traded some of it for chocolate frog liners from the seniors, some of it I poured out of the cauldron in Potions class.

As soon as Harry and Ron put the bird on the floor, Draco abruptly stopped acting like a statue, jumped out of his seat, picked up his owl, and stormed out of the study. The boys' ears heard the footsteps of Malfoy running away.

- That's it, we're finished," Ron said tiredly. - That snitch is going to rat us out to Snape....

- We'll say it was a joke," Richard said nonchalantly, satisfied that he'd sorted out the fake Philosopher's Stone and kept the owl intact.

- A joke? - Weasley exclaimed indignantly. - Do you think anyone would believe that?!

- Of course they will," Richard replied. - Or pretend to believe it. I've seen so much bullying in my year at Hogwarts, not to mention the senior transfiguration classes where students destroy mice or turn them into whatever the hell they are. So our 'joke' is not out of the ordinary behaviour of young wizards. At most, we'll get detention until the holidays start.

Ronald thought about it for a moment, and then a look of relief came over his face.

- Oh, really," he exhaled. - Fred and George had pulled a lot of equally awful pranks in a couple of years, and they'd got nothing but time off. Mum's the only one who's going to argue," he added with a frustrated look.

- It's a shame the stone was destroyed," Potter said sadly. - I'm sure Dumbledore won't get it! I hope we won't be expelled from Hogwarts, at least. We'll survive the term papers somehow.

- Then it's a deal," Richard said. - We just need to agree on a cover story. Remember - we were outside, quietly and peacefully relaxing after the History of Magic exam. Malfoy and his mates came up to us and provoked a conflict with foul language. After that, a fight broke out between us. We took offence at Malfoy and decided to play a joke on him. We brewed a joke potion and gave it to his owl. The joke worked - the owl shit on Malfoy at just the right moment, and he thought the world of us. We weren't animals, we didn't want to harm the owl in any way and we had thought of everything, we had prepared healing potions in advance so that if something happened to the bird, we could help it. Do you understand?

- Yes," Harry answered.

- Easy," Ron nodded in agreement.

- Ron..." Harry said, grinning at his friend.

- What?" Ron asked apprehensively.

- It was a great idea to bring Malfoy's owl on the case! - There was so much irony and sarcasm in Potter's voice that even a complete fool would have realised he thought otherwise.

- Harry, go fuck yourself," Ron replied tiredly. - I'd already realised it wasn't a good idea.

- It's okay, guys," Richard said in a soothing tone. - The main thing is that we're alive and well. The rest is nothing. Fuck this kind of adventure! We'd better hurry to dinner, or I'm afraid we won't be able to eat a bite when the headmaster comes back. I'm sure they'll call him in for a hot reprimand. Thank goodness they've banned corporal punishment at Hogwarts!

- That's right," Ron rubbed his right hand below his lower back involuntarily. - Who else would have forbidden Mum to swear?" when he caught Potter's mocking glare, he jumped up and added louder, "Yes, swearing! Not what you think....

- Yes, yes," Potter replied with an exaggeratedly cheerful look. - "I believe... Of course, 'swearing'..."

Richard's hand rested on Weasley's shoulder. Grosvenor's gaze read understanding and empathy:

- Ron, I know how you feel," he said. - I'll be scolded at home, too... I won't be able to sit down for three days. But that's the price of being adventurous, so deal with it.