Beginning Beyond The Horizon

After breaking up with Kenji and Keiji, Hajime returned to his usual self. He also changed schools and continued to lead a normal life. Hajime also found a part-time waitress job at another restaurant. He tried to keep himself busy, so he didn't have to think about Kenji.

Hajime tries not to think about Kenji, but Kenji is the first and last love in his life, so it's hard to forget Kenji. There were not many people on the evening train, and he was listening to kiss the rain by Yiruma. Of all Yiruma's music, kiss the rain is his favorite. Sometimes he will listen to Yiruma's music when he is very lonely, it helps calm his heart and his mind. The gentle piano music made him feel that life is worthwhile.

Hajime leaned back, leaned his head against the window and sighed. He opened his eyes and looked to the left, only to see the same girl in white looking at him with a smile. There were lights shining around where she sat.

Hajime thought he saw this girl because he was very tired recently, so he blinked twice, and then opened his eyes, but the girl was still sitting two seats away from him and staring at him.

On second thought, it might just be a coincidence that this girl was on the same train as him. He closed his eyes and continued listening to his music.

It was almost eleven o'clock when Hajime got out of the train station. Walking home, the breeze seems to be cooler than usual tonight. As he walked to his house, he saw the girl walking on the other side of the street. Hajime thought that this girl must live very close to here, so she and Hajime took the same train home. When he arrived at the apartment building, he slowly walked up the stairs to the room he shared with Aimi.

As Hajime reached for the key, he heard Aimi moan. Frowning, he put the keys back in his jacket pocket and walked down the stairs. He sat on the last step of the stairs until after one o'clock in the morning, when a middle-aged man came down.

Takami looked at Hajime and smirked while lighting a cigarette. He said, "Hey...you." Hajime didn't look up. "I've seen you here a few times. Your mother said she wants me to help you to become a host. Interested in being a host?"

Hajime didn't raise his head and didn't answer Takami.

Takami sat next to Hajime and blew cigarette smoke into Hajime's face. He laughed. He said, "You are pretty good-looking yourself. I know many people who are willing to spend a lot of money on you to accompany them." He reached out and rubbed Hajime's shoulder, but Hajime's hit Takami's hand away. Takami scoffed at Hajime's action. "Young man, with a sweet and lovely face, you can earn a lot of money as a host." He took a puff of his cigarette, and then exhaled on Hajime again. "A pretty boy like you can make a lot of money in one night."

Hajime said flatly, "Not interested." He stood up and walked up the stairs.

Takami scolded Hajime angrily, "You little shit! I'm trying to get you out of this miserable life! Although you're pretty, with that attitude, you won't succeed."

Hajime turned the doorknob, and the door wasn't even locked. He slowly opened the door, and just stepped into the door when he stepped on a large yellow envelope. He picked up the envelope, and it was written to him.

He does not know the sender. When he took a closer look, the envelope seemed to be from a law firm in Tokyo.

Hajime locked the door and walked in. When he got to the living room, he saw Aimi lying naked on the floor. Hajime walked past her, and she grabbed Hajime's left ankle.

Aimi turned her head and said, "Hajime-kun… I found a way out of this mess... Ito-san said you would make a great host." She was slurring her words. "Hajime-kun, did you hear that? Are you fucking deaf?"

Hajime jerked his feet away. He walks away and says, "I'm hearing you the first time." He knows there's no reason to talk to his mother when she's drunk.

Aimi grabbed an empty beer can and threw it at Hajime. The flying beer can hit Hajime on the back of the head. Aimi stood up and started hitting Hajime. She roared angrily, "Why didn't you answer when you heard that?" She continued to hit him. "Why are you so useless? Why did I give birth to you? Because of you, I lost everything. My dreams, my financial support, and my husband."

Hajime frowned, "Stop it." He pushed Aimi away from him. He looked at Aimi. "I also wish I was not your son, too."

Aimi said, "Then why are you still here? Huh? Why don't you die...so I can get your life insurance..." She bent down and vomited on the floor.

Hajime stared at her without saying a word. He turned and started walking away.

Aimi wiped her mouth and found Hajime walking away from her. She got angry and rushed over to continue beating Hajime. She roared, "You are an ungrateful bastard." She waved her fist at Hajime's head, hitting him repeatedly. "Without me, you'd die. Die! Why were you born? I wish you were never born. You can't do anything for me, you're a burden to me. I can't remarry because of your shit." She pushed Hajime to the floor and started kicking him. "I have to keep moving from place to place because of you. Why can't you be normal like everyone else?"

Hajime stood up and pushed Aimi away from him. Aimi swung her fist at Hajime again, but he grabbed Aimi's hand and pushed her to the floor. With tears streaming down his face, he said, "I would only give my life for the one who loves me unconditionally. I will never die for you, because dying for you is so meaningless." He rushed into his room, and closed the door.

Aimi banged on the door hard, and at the same time shouted angrily, "You little piece of shit. Get your ass out here…you hear me…get your ass out here."

Hajime sat down behind the door, wrapping his arms around his knees. He buried his face in his knees and sobbed. Then he heard a loud knock on the door, and Aimi seemed to be walking away from his bedroom door. Takami must have come back to spend the night with Aimi. He heard Aimi and Takami start talking when they entered Aimi's room. It didn't take long for Hajime to hear Aimi's moaning and the banging of the headboard hitting against the wall.

Hajime looked down at the floor, beside him was the big yellow envelope addressed to him. He opened the envelope and a business card dropped to the floor. He picked up the business card, which was from a law firm, the same law firm that had sent him the envelope. He looked inside, and there were two keys, a bank card, and two letters addressed to him. He read the first letter from the yellow envelope:

My dearest Hajime,

When you receive this letter, it means that I am no longer in this world. I want to say sorry. Sorry to leave you in that stairwell. Your face that day has never faded from my memory. I failed to protect you when you needed me the most. I want you to know that I really want to take you with me, but I can't bring myself to face your mother. I know I hurt you when I chose my wife and other sons, but I want to tell you that I love you, there is not a day that goes by that I don't think about you. My sweet obedient son, who has always thought of others before he thinks of himself. Inside this envelope, you will find a bankbook with your name and house keys. This house was given to me by your grandfather, and now I will give it to you. The house is waiting for you in Kamakura.

Love you to the moon and back,

Papa

Hajime held the yellow envelope and continued to sob, "Papa…"

Hajime knew that there was nothing left for him in this place. The thin line he marked between his mother and himself has crossed, and he no longer has the patience to keep drawing new thin lines. He no longer has Kenji; his personal hero and he knows his mother won't change. He stayed up all night, packing his luggage. After packing up, he realized that there were not many things that belonged to him. Staring at the two duffel bags, he realized that he didn't have many belongings because all his stuff was in the two duffel bags and his backpack.

Hajime knew that the first train left at five o'clock in the morning. He looked at his phone, it was already four o'clock in the morning. He walked quickly out of his room and out the front door. He walked down the stairs until he reached the end of the street. He stood where he was and waited for the walking lights to come on. Suddenly, a bright headlamp shot straight at him. He blinked, and then he saw a light panel roll quickly past him.

Hajime heard a soft female voice calling his name. The woman's voice was getting closer and closer to his ears. The woman's voice whispered softly in Hajime's left ear, "Hajime… wake up."