Danganronpa: Once Upon an Smiling Priest

"Okay, time to get down to business." The moment everyone concluded their respective introductions, Mr 'I'm better than you' Togami didn't waste a moment in taking the lead on the next topic at hand. "This is no time to stand around making friends like a bunch of dull-eyed baboons."

Weird comparison aside, he was right. That being said… No. For the time being, I saw no reason to gather unnecessary attention to my person. So, unless circumstances obliged otherwise, keeping any idle commentaries to myself was for the best.

I'm supposed to help others shine. Not myself.

Apologies, but I'll help these sorry lot in my own way.

"Oh, right." Mr Naegi chimed in, a look of realization on his face. "I believe someone said something about a bigger problem or something like that. What was that about?"

"Well, you see… Naegi, you said a bunch of stuff happened, and then you were 'just asleep', right?" Mrs Maizono, who decided to be the one to fill the Ultimate Lucky Student in, spoke up. "The thing is, the same happened to all of us."

"What!? Seriously!?" The boy Understandably so, Mr Naegi couldn't hide his surprise.

"Yeah, just like the girl said." Mr Kuwata confirmed as he awkwardly began to rub the back of his head. "After each one of us got through the gates, we lost consciousness. And when we came to, we were somewhere here in the school! That's what happened to you, right?"

"I-I see." Mr Naegi gave him a nod, though he wasn't looking any less nervous. "But, that's just weird! That every one of us would get knocked out like that…"

Good, they've started to understand their circumstances. There's only so long one can look at reality and distort their view of it to convince themselves that there's nothing wrong.

"Damn right, it's weird as fuck!" Mr Owada growled. "That's why we're freakin' out!"

"That's not the only thing." Following the brute's loud exclamation, Taka chimed in. "You saw where all the windows in the classes and hallways were supposed to be, right? But instead of that, it was a bunch of big metal plates! What's that about!?"

"Plus, all my stuff's missing! Even my cellphone…" Mrs Enoshima commented, her brows furrowed. It seems like she has since calmed down from our little... incident.

"Y-Yeah." Mrs Fujisaki gave a weak nod. "I haven't seen my PDA either."

I nodded my head in understanding of Mrs Enoshima's annoyance. It wasn't a good feeling having your personal items taken from you. Though I couldn't deny that the most tragic thing is Mrs Fujisaki losing his possessions. Though it wasn't a surprising one.

It makes sense though. If I were in our captor's shoes I too would have taken away their electronics. Especially Mrs Fujisaki. They would be the last person I want to have access to technology.

"And then there's the main hall here." Taka added while pointing at the highly advanced vault door. "The front exit is completely blocked by some giant metal hatch… but I didn't see anything like that when I got here! What the heck!? What it's doing here!?"

Everyone began to have contemplative looks on their faces when he said that. And that was really it. Not one had yet to comment on the hanging weapons that could have turned them all into Swiss cheese. Much to Oberon's dismay and irritation.

"Hey… what if we are part of, like, you know." Enoshima began, a light-blue hue whitening her already pale face. From growing dread, I supposed. "…A crime, or something?"

It's not a matter of if Mrs Enoshima. I thought shaking my head slightly. But I wouldn't expect a bunch of inexperienced kids to understand the gravitas of what has happened to us. I began to think back to what happened to me when I first entered Hope's Peak. Having us all knocked out with ease and so quickly and for Lord knows how long isn't something we should brush aside.

"Wait, like… a kidnapping?" Mr Kuwata commented, some realization developing on his and our classmates' faces. They were beginning to see things for what they were. About time. "You think maybe someone grabbed us and hauled us off and we're not actually at school?"

An interesting thought overall. The ramifications of which, if true, would be quite interesting. Though I doubt that to be the case. In any case, it was a good thing that they were taking this more seriously. Shedding their fear and naivety as they stepped onto the stage.

If things continued like this then we would definitely―

"Come, don't think like that, everyone. Cheer up!"

...

...

...

What?

I tilted my head over to the SHSL Clavioyant whose words confirmed to me, more than ever, that he was an absolute idiot who would die off without much issue. His role being fulfilled to show everyone what not to do.

"I bet this is all just part of the school's orientation procedure." He spoke up again, nodding sagely at the complete and utter nonsense coming out of his words. "Yeah! I'm sure that's it! So, I'm just gonna take it easy for a little bit!"

To be honest, I was not that surprised he of all people was in denial. It made sense given our situation. And besides, it was human nature to deny anything that didn't conform and/or confirm our worldview.

But at least not everyone was that stupid to―

"Oh, so you think they wanted to do something to surprise us?" Mrs Fujisaki asked, with the programmer rapidly showing signs of relief.

…Well, given the stress it was causing Mrs Fujisaki, and that she was likely the most vulnerable among us, that explains why the Programmer would cling so desperately to the first source of comfort available.

As much as I hated to see it. It was simply logical.

Still. With all of the glaring evidence among us, It was going to be nothing more than a detriment to deny it. And there would be no way that many people would fall to―

"Huh, really? Well, if that's all it is, it's nap time for me." Mr Kuwata grinned, letting out a sigh as stress began leaving his body. "I kind of pulled an all-nighter last night, so I could use a bit of a little shuteye."

Glancing around, I noticed how more than half the group began to relax. Their tension evaporated as if we no longer were held at gunpoint. No! no! Stop you idiots! This is how they get you!

Tch. Of course, take the comment of the biggest fool in the room at face value, sure, what could go wrong with that?

I wasn't interested in taking part in the talk they were having, but they truly required a reality check. Otherwise, they would end up dragging me down with them when faced directly with whoever was in charge of all of this, and we had to deal with their intentions. And given the direction this was going, I have no doubt that that would be soon.

With that in mind, I decided it was finally time for me to step up as the noble servicemen I was.

"This is all well and good, and I don't mean to put you all down but―"

Ding dong bing bong!

A bell-like noise interrupted what I was going to say, and before I could make another attempt, the monitor in the room turned on. For a few seconds, nothing but buzzing noises came from the static-covered screen.

And with it, whatever little respite we as captives had was coming to an end.

Speak of the Devil and he shall appear. I chuckled bitterly to myself. Not going unnoticed by, curiously enough, Mrs Enoshima.

"Ahem! Ahem! Testing! Testing! Mike check, Mike check, one, two! This is a test of the school broadcast system!"

Oh? I couldn't help but open my eyes slightly at this. Well, this is getting interesting.

Such a chipper and lively voice. Considering our situation and everything I've, technically, not seen so far, it's obvious that whoever was behind that screen had found some kind of great enjoyment out of this spectacle.

Unfortunately, while I have eyes I have failed to recognise Mount Taisha.

Although to say that alarm bells weren't ringing in my head would be lying.

"Am I on? If so… to all incoming students! I would like to begin the entrance ceremony at… right now! Please make your way to the gymnasium at your earliest convenience… That's all. I'll be waiting!"

Entrance ceremony, they said… Either they were mocking us with the thought that this is, in fact, Hope's Peak. Playing up this possible farce. Or I was right in my reasoning.

One thing was clear, though. Whomever our captor was, there's no doubt about it, they were a dangerously eccentric character.

I should prepare for anything. The last thing their kind was known for was going by the norm. A quite chaotic character has just entered the stage. I wonder how this act will unfold.

"…What. The. Hell was that just now?" For a corner, I heard Mrs Enoshima's voice break the silence that followed the announcement. "Like, I'm not the only one getting weird vibes from it, right?"

Rather than an answer, everyone's attention went to the sound of footsteps moving towards the door we all came from, where the Affluent Progeny's figure became smaller with every step he took.

"Well then, if you'll excuse me."

With those parting words, Mr Togami made his way out of the hall. He didn't need to say anything. He didn't need to do anything and yet he did. Why? because it was hard coded into a Togami's DNA to show off.

"H-Hey! What, you're gonna take off just like that!?" Mrs Enoshima protested, groaning soon after she saw the blonde scion was already gone.

"Ohh yeah, now I get it!" Ugh, I highly doubt he did. "This whole thing was just to get us all pumped up for the entrance ceremony! Man, thank God it was all a joke. I'd be totally freaked if this was real!"

O' Lord you're all stupid. Why did I have to be given such shoddy actors?

"Alright, guess I'll head out, too. Hmm, I wonder what they got planned for us next." Following the Togami's steps, Hiro left the hall, not without still pondering aloud about how exciting of a dynamic this was.

…I'm just gonna tune out whenever that guy talks. The chances of him saying something useful or interesting were as low as everything he had said so far turning out to be true.

"Damn, I was looking forward to that nap." Mr Kuwata grumbled, then he stuffed his hands in his pockets before biding to the mysterious voice's request. "Geez, why'd they have to go and kill the mood?"

"W-Wait for me!" Likely not wanting to be left behind, The SHSL Programmer quickly scurried towards those who already left. "I wanna go with you!"

"That is that, then. I will see you all there" Celes commented with a smile before calmly strolling out of the main hall.

By that point, a large majority left the room, and save for Mrs Kirigiri, the remaining students stood there. Either too shocked to move their bodies or the wariness making them unable to guess how should they proceed.

Might as well give them the required push-up.

"…We should get moving." I said cheerfully and loud enough for some heads to snap their heads in my direction with the two butterflies that had been perched on my shoulder for a while suddenly fluttering to life, disappearing into the ceiling before that. How long were they there for? "We don't know what our captors are capable of if we don't abide by their orders."

"C-Captors!?" Mrs Maizono gave me a concerned look. As if I was the one spilling incoherencies. "W-What are you talking about…?"

"I don't think we should jump to conclusions!" Mr Naegi quickly chimed in. "I'm sure this is just the wacky way Hope's Peak does these things. Like Hiro said!"

"Regardless of what is true." Whether to reassure them or just because she felt like moving things along, Mrs Kirigiri's voice cut the growing tension. "Just staying here isn't going to help in any way. Besides, aren't you guys a little bit curious to find out what's going on around here?"

"If we do not move forward, we learn nothing. The only choice is to push ahead." Ogami commented. Her serene voice and imposing figure did wonders in calming everyone down.

Seeing no reason to correct anyone, I decided to not push my argument or the objective truth any further.

"It's settled then." I began with a clap of my hands. "Let's get going." Was everything I said before turning to leave the main hall, with the remaining students following as well.

It's time to finally see what our captor has in store for us. They've surely set a grand stage for us if they've gone through so much effort to do this.

Once we left the main hall, our little group of Ogami, Kirigiri, Enoshima, Maizono, Naegi, and I '…Hmm, well I guess it wouldn't be considered a little group if we makeup about a third of the student body', turned to the left, in the same direction where that gate from before was, and headed in search of the gym.

Still, just because I was surrounded by people, didn't mean that I stopped doing the same extra measure I was busy with on my way to the main hall. Of course, that was to check the doors while we moved on. Some of these doors included a Nurse's office and some restrooms, one for each gender.

Though just as in previous cases, they were all locked.

"Eh? What are you doing?" Mrs Enoshima broke the silence with a confused look on her face. "Is that like, some kind of a weird hobby of yours?"

It also appeared that my antics didn't go unnoticed or uncommented, not that I cared if I was honest. I was just doing this for m- our safety, yeah.

"I was just curious about our surroundings." I replied with a shrug. "Seeing as we are going in this direction, I decided to check if any door was open on the way to the gym."

"That's reasonable" Mrs Kirigiri commented. However, her slight look of suspicion didn't go unnoticed by me.

"I don't think that's the case…" Mr Naegi sweatdropped, for some strange reason. Well If you have a better idea or plan why don't you speak up about it?

"You shouldn't say that, Naegi!" From her side, the Ultimate Idol chided the Luckster. "Everyone has their own hobbies!"

It wasn't a hobby, though… and why would opening doors be considered a hobby? Was I that out of touch with my fellow year... No, no, it couldn't possibly be me.

"Distraction or not, it matters not… we have arrived."

Leaving that weird interaction aside, Sakura was right. After taking another turn near the blocked gate, we found the double doors that would lead us to the gym. At least the sign with the legend 'Gym' beside them indicated that much.

Without wasting time, I went inside.

======

Once within the new room, what greeted me was… not the gym, but instead some kind of trophy room. How odd.

On my left there were multiple display cases, showing all kinds of trophies and medals. It was a similar case on the opposite side, only with the addition of a surveillance camera. Ahead of me was a TV 'Definitely for those broadcasts we just saw on the main hall…' along with a second double door below it.

If I had to take a guess, this is the one that will lead to the actual gym.

"God, I had no idea this Hope's Peak Academy was going to be such a pain in the nuts." Mr Owada grumbled. "It ain't that different from the time I spent in juvie. Hell, this place is even worse!" So I was close to what his talent entailed.

"And why isn't there anyone here?" Mrs Maizono wondered aloud, a worried frown smearing her face. "We've been walking through the halls for a while now, and I still haven't seen someone besides us so far…"

"Isn't that like, seriously not good?" Mrs Enoshima added, seemingly just as on edge as the Idol. I didn't look in either of their directions, well moreso Mrs Enoshima's. Afraid that I might rip off the wig on her head. I still couldn't figure out why it made me so mad.

"Th-They're just trying to spook us! They'll take those metal plates down later, I'm sure of it…" Mr Taka said, though as hard as he tried, his voice and posture weren't doing wonders in convincing anyone about this place's safety.

Speaking of which.

"What about the mounted weapons at the entrance of the school?" I asked nonchalantly. While I expected the reaction I still needed to confirm their mental state. And besides, it felt somewhat liberating finally pointing that out.

Strange.

"You shouldn't joke about that! It is clear they are fake!" Mr Taka chided me with indignation. Much to my annoyance. "There's no way Hope's Peak would put such a dangerous thing for real, right!?"

No use in trying to snap them out of that train of thought, huh?

Or maybe I'm not pushing hard enough.

"…Just be ready for anything, for your own good." Opening my eyes slightly I looked directly into his, my usually cheerful and upbeat voice dropping as I continued. "The world is a cruel and dangerous place and you could never truly know the reason for someone's actions."

I tilted my head upwards and to the side though still maintaining eye contact. "Whether good or bad, the fact remains all the same. There are mounted weapons at the entrance." Closing my eyes as I finished.

I pressed on. this little pitiful display to cling on to their ivory world must be broken before it's too late. Especially if they were going to be so stubborn about it.

"He is right." Well, at least Sakura appreciated and understood my advice. "All we can do now is hope for the best and prepare for the worst. Nothing ventured, nothing gained."

"Well hell, it ain't like I'm scared or anythin' of that junk. Let's just get this over with!" The SHSL Gang Leader shouted while storming off the room. "Hey! Where's the bastard who called us here!"

"Owada, stop! No running in the halls!" Soon, the hall monitor followed after the pompadour-haired teenager.

"I too shall go."

"H-Hey, wait!" With a rather masculine voice, Mr Yamada yelped before following the Martial artist. "Don't leave me here all alone!"

Save for Ogami, that left me with the group from earlier. They all had faces that showed their uneasiness with this whole ordeal… well, everyone but Kirigiri. She remained as stoic as usual, but that's the norm with her, I supposed.

The straight man of our group I suppose. Good for her though, she will need it for what is to come.

That was the question of the moment, wasn't it?

What exactly will await me once I push those doors open?

Well, standing here is only delaying the inevitable. The stage awaits! And the audience demands our arrival!

"…Let's begin." With that, I finally left the trophy room, with my body prepared, both in body and mind, against whatever our captor might feel inclined to throw at us.

Let's just hope that it's a good play, less I make it more interesting. I thought as a smile returned to my face.