LIGHTNOVELWORLD Chapter 55: 55
Even Iida doesn't say anything to Kacchan anymore that could possibly upset him. Not since that day. Kacchan is six and a half months pregnant now and most of the time he just looks so stressed out, no one is willing to accidentally make it worse.
"Kacchan? Come on, it's time for lunch," I gently prodded him. He freaked out so badly that day he spent the whole night crying and it wasn't until he fell asleep that he could finally stop. He refused to go to classes and it wasn't until Aizawa Sensei came to see him for himself that Kacchan dragged himself out of bed. Dad tried but he ended up just coddling him more. Aunty tried of course but he is immune to her nagging and Mom refused to even try. I wanted to help but at the same time, what can I actually do? My lover went through something so scary and all I could do was stand there. Sure, I sent Iida and sure I was able to calm Kacchan down after the fact but in the moment? At that moment I couldn't really do anything at all to help.
And now I feel powerless because what if it happened again?
"Kacchan? Should we just return to the dorms? I tried a different tactic, mostly because I just want to curl up in a ball and cry but no one besides Kacchan really needs to know that. I saw him smile a little and nod weakly.
I pulled him a little closer and gave him a small kiss on his forehead and carefully guided him away from the cafeteria and towards our comfortable bed.
***
"You have to stop skipping classes," Aizawa Sensei groaned. At least he waited until classes ended to come find us. We were curled up in bed in our pajamas and I was just holding Kacchan carefully guarding him and our baby.
Sensei sighed and shook his head when we didn't answer and stepped into the room and sat in the desk chair. "I'm going to ask questions but once I leave the room they never happened," he glared at us, mostly me and I just shrugged. If he wants to get personal I don't really care right now. Not after everything else.
"When was the last time you two had sex?"
"Uh, I don't know," I hesitated but Kacchan answered instead. It was a couple weeks before the miscarriage scare. Ouch. Has it really been that long? Really? That's been weeks ago now, almost a month.
"Do you two realize that sex is a healthy way to lower stress?" He sighed and rubbed at his eyes as if he couldn't believe he was having this conversation at all.
"But what about-," I started but he quickly cut me off.
"A HEALTHY way to relieve stress!" He repeated through clenched teeth. He took a deep breath to calm himself but then added, "I had a conversation with Recovery Girl before the… Scare."
I nodded in understanding and turned my focus back to Kacchan who was frowning but otherwise not really responding. I do actually remember bringing this up early in the pregnancy but I guess Kacchan wasn't the only one stressed at the moment.
"I would never force you," I gently nuzzled him and he let out a sigh.
"I know. It's just that before I was kind of… Forcing it? You were so tired and then with everything from my stupid pride to the, the, the," he froze, not willing to say it so Sensei said it for him. Scare. He nodded and kept going. "Since then I just couldn't. My body just feels so, foreign to me. I KNOW that it's okay to do things. But I kept thinking, I was only sitting in class. I was just sitting there, I wasn't twisting or reaching or lifting, I wasn't doing any of the things they say not to do but," he stopped talking and I gently cuddled him in my arms.
"You are the most amazing man in the world, do you know that?" He looked at me like I was crazy but I just giggled and nuzzled into him. "If you want to just go on bed rest for the rest of the pregnancy I'm fine with it. Just so long as you are happy and healthy," I love being able to cuddle Kacchan. The way his body laid against mine made the whole world stop turning.
"Deku ever since then your thoughts have almost exclusively been about how you somehow failed us," he frowned. "It wasn't your fault, you didn't do anything to hurt us either but you've been beating yourself up over it way more than I have."
"Thoughts?" Oops. I'm going to ignore that for as long as I can. We weren't really hiding the fact that Kacchan can hear my thoughts but I would rather not hear an ethical lecture on why or how it's not okay. Especially right now.
"Kacchan, I couldn't do anything to help though. Maybe if I could have then you wouldn't be so stressed. Maybe-," I don't know what else to say. What could I say? Is there anything that I could say that would somehow fill this hollow feeling in my chest? To make all this regret just go away?
"No. Deku, the baby and I are fine and if it wasn't for you calming me down that day, that might not be the case now. You have been more than good," he grumbled, the way he pouted at me was so cute and for the first time in ages I wanted to do more than just hug and cuddle him. He smiled up at me.
"What do you mean by his only thoughts?" Aizawa Sensei really wasn't letting the slip of the tongue go.
"Didn't you say this conversation didn't happen once you left the room?" Kacchan snapped at him but he held his ground waiting on an answer.
"We are allowed our secrets too. Now go away before you see what you really don't want to," I smiled at him while cuddling Kacchan in my arms. I snuggled into his neck and gave small kisses so that I could hear his beautiful laugh.
"I will find out eventually," he sighed before adding, "unfortunately." I shrugged the thought away and simply cuddled the sweet and beautiful man in my arms. Hmmm it's been a while since we've made some fireworks.
"Get the fuck out. We are going to be HEALTHY, as you put it," Kacchan barked at him and he finally gave in and left the room. I quickly locked the door behind him before snuggling into my husband and getting some sweet kisses, the kind I have so dearly missed.