How to Grow Old

Raj, still inhabiting his Sel, sighs and paces forward with a heavy step. He pouts, walking past the other empty Sels, through the darkness, and toward a passageway.

Raj Xian can overhear the voice of his once master in a language inaudible to humans, and it hums, echoing through the desolate and dark hall:

"Light permeates the void.

Light permeates the void.

Darkness extends.

Light permeates the void."

A tinted round window, a small metal door at the end of the hall. The supreme reaches the door, peering through the window—above the assembly line of Souxians in their individual orbiting shells stops here. None would ever pass; beyond the door dwells Uno Xian, a powerful source. They broke off one by one, as they desired, assuring freedom and budding individuality. He rests in the chains of copper aluminum, surrounded by hanging cages of birds, which sound to weaken him. The order weakened the telepathic bond he shares with all of them. Although unbreakable, it prevents him from communicating or trying to convince them to return. Only Raj hears his voice still calling, though strained by the confines and chains that bind him.

Raj looks through the window at Uno, his face now pressed, and prayer dismissed as his eyes widen at the intensity of light. His Sel has become blind to it. Eyes burned from the first look.

Only Raj dares to converse with Uno Xian, whose wicked purpose cannot be silenced. Uno Xian's affirmations subside, aware that Raj is standing outside his door. "I could sense her power from here," he whispers. The light whips and cracks.

"What of it?" Raj questions. He takes Betani's delicate strands of hair and wraps them around his finger.

"You will regret creating such a being. Tell me she is the only one of her kind?"

Raj licks his lips, "—we have watched her carefully over the years. She shows great promise and obedience."

Uno laughs, "As did once all of you. You'll soon get a taste of the same lessons that have crossed me."

"Unlikely. How can she make the most of her power when she knows nothing of it?"

"She believes herself to be an imperfect human?"

"She believes—whatever we tell her."

"How can you be so sure? And now you allow her to cross over to the 'Near Edge'?"

"She's shown no inclination to defect. How can we expect her to remain loyal to the order if she has no perceived idea that she is free?"

"In due time, amongst the enduring, she'll soon learn she is nothing but—"

"Nonsense. She considers their imminent fate a compelling reason to stay within the Souxian Order's protection."

"Then you're a fool, Raj. Defectors have spread in great numbers, and they have become powerful. Worse yet, an enemy remains to be uncovered amongst us—"

"You are no longer 'us', Uno. If it weren't for your power being of use, I'd have you eliminated like we did with LXXXIII."

"Nothing can destroy us. I can feel LXXXIII, their pulse still out there, though changed. No matter what you believe, it will always be 'us'. You are not just a part of me, you are me."

" —-and we may never want the same things."

"You desire the same, only for yourself alone."

"The problem with you, Uno, is that you believe to have power is to be the keeper of everything and everyone. See that you are kept now?"

"You can only keep me if you convince them. It only takes one to free me. I will swallow you like a fly. I will bury you in the light. "

"Until then—enjoy drowning in raven song." Raj pulls a lever, unleashing a swarm of agitated ravens and other desert birds. They fly around Uno Xian's cage, drowning out his screams. His screams die down until only a whisper remains, as he shrinks and withers within himself. Sparks fly from him, incinerating the birds that get too close, and they fall to the floor in black heaps. He weeps at their descent. The observant ones fly back to their cages, to safety, yet still shriek aloud, wearing Uno down. Raj turns from the window, still playing with Betani's strand of hair with his thumb and forefinger. He tastes it between his lips, and his eyes roll back.

After Uno Xian spends most of his energy to fight off the birds, they quiet down—with only an occasional squawk from one or two, which irritates him. As Raj passes back through the hallway, his feet smacking, he can hear once more the echoing of Uno Xian's prayers—though this time with less reverberation, the tone is submissive and huffy.

Raj Xian reaches his chamber, a glass bulb that hangs above. He exits his Sel, the old man writhing and weak, Raj ascends. The Sel does not fall, though he could, swaying, his head bobbing from his strained neck which jerks back at release.

This post now appears empty and quiet. The Souxians are at rest. The Sels are at ease. A high-pitched ringing awakens the humans. They return to their quarters for ample rest. Except for the old man, who when he wakes gasps and grasps at his chest. He falls to the floor. The other Sels pretend not to notice as his consciousness fades, except for Suni's Sel, whose head perks up and lips frown as he tiptoes away in silence.