I Possessed the Heroine’s Teacher

Since I had nothing else to do, I decided to stroll through the garden in the Imperial Palace. It was said that the garden was open to those invited to the palace, and indeed, it was quite clean and peaceful. Personally, I don’t like being in the sunlight, but I make an exception for places like this. So, I’m the son of the sun god Surya.

As I strolled through the garden under the protection of the sun god Surya, I spotted Lorcha. She was admiring the flowers, unaware of my presence nearby. As the son of the sun god, I couldn’t resist playing a prank.

“What are you doing there, Lorcha, the Master of the Magic Tower?”

Lorcha jumped in surprise and turned around.

“Ah, you scared me! You should make some noise when you approach someone!”

“Sorry, it’s just a habit…”

It seemed that yesterday’s fight with those bastards had brought out my old habits. Damn Communists, because of them, I was getting scolded by Lorcha. They were truly useless bastards. Next time I see them, I’ll turn them into Ultra Red Masks, not just Super Red Masks. I’ll tear them in half, meaning I’ll cut them in half.

“So, what are you doing here?”

I was curious why the Master of the Magic Tower was suddenly in the garden of the Imperial Palace, admiring flowers. Did she bury some treasure here? In movies, it’s common to hide treasures in places like this garden.

What kind of treasure could be hidden here? Sulfuras? The sheath of the King of Knight? What could it be? Could it be Hitler’s gold? No, that’s a plausible story. If I see Neo-Nazis here, insulting me with racial slurs, it’s possible that Nazis transported Hitler’s gold to this world. It was worth investigating.

“Did you bury something here?”

“…No, I didn’t.”

Her reaction confirmed that it was indeed Hitler’s gold. But even if it was loot buried by Neo-Nazis, the ownership belonged to Lorcha, who found it. I didn’t want to get into a mud fight over the ownership of someone else’s loot.

“If you say so, then it must be true.”

“Don’t misunderstand, I didn’t bury anything here! And don’t tell anyone else, okay?!”

“I won’t tell anyone, I promise.”

I can keep the secret that you buried Hitler’s gold here. As a friend.

“By the way, I have something to give you.”

“Something?”

Was she trying to bribe me with a piece of gold to keep my mouth shut? I’m the son of the sun god Surya and the successor of the Allies who defeated the Nazis. I won’t be swayed by just one piece of gold. If Lorcha tries to bribe me like those cowardly Nazis, my Jeet Kune Do, in the name of love and justice, won’t forgive her.

“Here’s the first job for you.”

Instead of a piece of gold, she handed me a letter with the job details. Fortunately, it wasn’t a bribe, but I still felt disgusted. If it had been a bribe, I wouldn’t have felt so annoyed. I felt like punching her in the face.

The letter contained the following:

[To the Royal Mage, Werner:]

What the hell, couldn’t they write more casually? Do thorns grow in their mouths if they write comfortably and softly?

[Recently, there has been a rapid increase in the number of child abductions in the capital.]

Damn, how bad is the security that innocent children suffer? This is not something I should be blamed for, but the Capital Guard should be held accountable. Hey, you bastards, how bad is your work that child abductions have increased recently? Those bastards must be drinking and sleeping with women at night…

[So, recently, the number of guards and their training has been increased, and they have been deployed for patrols. However, yesterday, four guards were found dead in a terrible state.]

Ah, young guardsmen, I, Werner, believe in you. If anyone tries to dishonor your honor, my Jeet Kune Do will not forgive them. I’ll deliver a liver blow, followed by a one-inch punch to the solar plexus and a high kick to the temple. That’s how I’ll judge those bastards. How dare they insult those who dedicate their lives to the country? There are no such bastards in the world.

[Therefore, we want to entrust you with the investigation and resolution of this matter. If you need anything for your work, please make a separate claim to the head of the Knights, Ricardo.]

That was the end of the letter. In short, child abductions have increased, and the Capital Guard can’t handle it, so they want me to take care of it.

These bastards, the Capital Guard should solve their own problems. They should let the Capital Guard handle it, not bother someone else. Honestly, the guards who died on duty would want the Capital Guard to solve the problem. They wouldn’t want a Great Mage, who suddenly showed up, to take over.

On top of everything, this was the end of it. In a game, they would at least give experience, money, or an item. What kind of ridiculous quest is this? I should punch the quest designer in the face with a capitalism punch.

“Who the hell came up with this fucking order…”

“It’s an order approved by His Majesty the Emperor. If you say something wrong, your head will roll.”

Damn this fucking monarchy.

“You can curse the Emperor in private, right?”

“No, this isn’t some back-alley bar, it’s the garden of the Imperial Palace, you idiot.”

Oh, that’s right. Even so, cursing the owner in their garden is a bit much. I should reflect deeply on this.

The difference between humans and animals is that humans can reflect on their mistakes. Look, when I’m pointed out my mistakes, I immediately accept them.

My shining personality is to accept my mistakes. I am the Arhat, who has cut off all worldly desires and attained enlightenment, a saint with a pure heart.

“So, Lorcha, the Master of the Magic Tower, do you know anything about these recent child abductions?”

“I only know that child abductions have increased, but I don’t know the details. But something smells fishy.”

What the hell, did I just come back from the bathroom and not wash my hands properly? I’m the protector of cleanliness, and even if there’s a faint smell, it’s very weak.

I should have known when I saw her slightly blue hair. Lorcha, with her blue hair, has a keen sense of smell and is a descendant of a gourmet family who can throw forks and knives and deliver devastating hammer punches. So, she could smell my faint scent…

“The Black Round Table.”

Ah, those bastards.

“I think they’re directly or indirectly related to this.”

I began to suspect that those Communist bastards might be hiding in underground tunnels. Let’s find those tunnels.

“Lorcha, the Master of the Magic Tower, are there any tunnels in the capital?”

“No, of course not. There are sewers, though.”

There are only crocodiles in the sewers, not Communists. So, where are these Communist bastards hiding?

“There’s also a rumor that strange sounds are coming from the sewers.”

“That’s the crocodiles, you idiot!”

“Why are there crocodiles in the sewers, you crazy bastard!”

She’s denying the common sense of the ecosystem again. Isn’t it common knowledge that there are crocodiles and ninjas in the sewers, and rats that teach them? It seems that the mages in this world only study magic and neglect other fields of knowledge.

I sighed at their ignorance. To reach the true end of knowledge, one must study all fields without discrimination.

“It’s common knowledge that there are crocodiles and turtles in the sewers, Lorcha, the Master of the Magic Tower.”

“Common knowledge, my ass! Why the hell are there crocodiles and turtles in the sewers?!”

Lorcha started screaming, her voice hoarse.

“Lorcha, lower your voice, it’s impolite.”

“How can I not be angry when you’re so damn ignorant?!”

What a loudmouth, like a train horn.

At that moment, a voice was heard in the distance.

“His Royal Highness, the Crown Prince, is coming!”

Look, because of Lorcha’s foolishness and loudness, even the Crown Prince is coming.

But if the Crown Prince comes, I’m screwed, isn’t it? Because of this stupid Lorcha, everything’s going to go wrong.