I Start with a Bad Hand!

“Degoph. Mind if I sit here?”

Ah, just what I need to ruin the taste of my food. I just wanted a quiet meal.

It was during a late lunch with Agnes, and Klaus happened to be there that day. We weren’t usually close enough to share meals, but it seemed Klaus was still bothered by the incident where he’d ‘accidentally’ been hit by a falling tray.

As usual, Aiden’s cronies were looking over from a distance with intrigued expressions.

“I actually had something I wanted to ask you about, but I think I’ve found the answer.”

“If you’ve already found the answer, why tell me? Write it in your diary or something.”

However, by now, Aiden and I had progressed to the point where we could provoke each other without even listening to what the other said, so my response was just a filler. Aiden pretended not to hear and continued.

“It’s about that leg. It’s all over the academy.”

“Busy minding others’ legs, no wonder your grades are what they are.”

“…And you in that worn-out, hand-me-down looking dress talking about how someone fixed a leg.”

“What are you on about…”

Agnes muttered quietly beside me. Her face, full of mockery, cracked slightly. Aiden casually cracked his neck, making a slight sound, but he did not look at Agnes, keeping his gaze fixed only on me.

“There’s talk of you wandering around with some guy during the festival.”

“…What?”

“Covered up his face suspiciously. And coincidentally, you came back from the festival having fixed that leg, right?”

Upon hearing Aiden’s words, Agnes and Klaus stopped what they were doing and looked at me.

‘…What the hell is he talking about? Is it what I think it is?’

I stopped messing with my salad and looked straight at Aiden.

“Speak clearly. Stop beating around the bush.”

“Jealous of you leveraging everything you have for your benefit.”

“…What I have? And what would that be?”

“Your pretty face?”

This bastard. I barely stopped Klaus as he abruptly got up to grab Aiden by the collar. Despite raising his hands in a gesture of surrender, Aiden was still smiling with a look of triumph.

What’s with that gesture. Why do all these fencing club kids act like this?

“Just asking. Why are you so sensitive about it?”

Why do you act like that? It was frustrating and draining at the same time. Muttering sexual insults as if they were some kind of decisive knockout blow, or a salvation spell that leads him from being cornered to victory. Where do they learn that from?

“Where did you learn to speak like that? From your father?”

Aiden’s expression hardened at my question. But my question wasn’t meant to be sarcastic. If we were to measure the content of ridicule versus curiosity, it was more out of curiosity.

“…What?”

“About being seen with a man during the festival, you’re implying that I’m exploiting my face for benefit. So, you’re saying that I sold my face to fix my leg, aren’t you?”

Aiden’s lips quivered.

“I never said that.”

“Do you think I can’t read between the lines of your nonsense? For someone who’s supposed to be top of the class?”

“So, that’s your victim mentality.”

Oh… victim mentality. That was genuinely funny. I couldn’t hide the sneer that escaped as I laughed, and Aiden’s face contorted. Seeing that almost made my lost appetite return. I took another bite of my salad.

“You always call me cowardly, but when you really look at it, you’re the truly cowardly one. If you have something to say, say it directly. Don’t try to offload your base motives onto me by talking about my supposed victim mentality.”

Maybe you’re just seeing your most hated traits reflected in me. At that, Aiden, who had been marked by Klaus all this while, pushed him roughly and glared at him.

“Get a grip. Aren’t you embarrassed for your sister to see you behaving like this?”

At that, Agnes and I exchanged glances. Exactly. Meanwhile, Aiden had strode up to me.

“Since you put it that way, I have to say it too. If you’re a student at the Royal Academy, act like one. I’m telling you to conduct yourself properly.”

“Why are you…?”

“Stop walking around like you’re some pimp.”

The cafeteria fell silent as the grave. Not a single breath could be heard. Perhaps emboldened by the silence, Aiden’s face relaxed, he twisted his lips into a smirk, and said,

“Otherwise, how would someone as insignificant as you, coming from the sticks, get to meet a priest? Unless you sell, look!”

“…Look?”

He couldn’t finish his sentence.

A forcefully swung tray struck Aiden’s head. It felt as if a sewing machine had violently punched his upper teeth through his tongue. Without that, blood wouldn’t be dripping from his mouth like that.

“Say that again. What did you say?”

The warrior with the tray was Agnes.

She was mercilessly urging Aiden to respond while he was still reeling. Now, the only sounds in the cafeteria were the clanging of the dropped tray and Agnes breathing heavily. I looked over at her, standing strong beside me.

That was… that really was… Rock, itself.

Rumors circulated at the academy that a commoner had struck a noble-born student on the head with a tray in the cafeteria. As soon as Roxanne heard this story, she muttered without realizing,

“Is it that kid?”

Even knowing now that this kid was from a baron’s family, strangely, Dietrich’s face came to mind first. Those fierce eyes. She thought that she might do something like this someday.

‘She was that kid’s friend.’

Upon learning the full story, Roxanne nodded without realizing. Somehow, she had made friends with someone similar to herself. As soon as Cedric heard the story, he wore a look of disdain. Knowing that Cedric rarely made such expressions, Roxanne felt a bit strange.

‘Why does he always care about that kid….’

She couldn’t help but care, and it wasn’t just because of the incidents involving that kid’s father. Even without any interaction, stories about Dietrich kept flowing to Roxanne.

‘He topped his class again.’

Cedric had entered the academy as the top student and graduated as valedictorian. Evan had skipped a grade to join her at the academy as the top student.

Yet she wasn’t part of that narrative.

Her family didn’t say anything to Roxanne, but there are times when unconditional love isn’t enough. There are moments when you want to give back the love you’ve received and yearn for expectations beyond just affection.

“I need to maintain a certain rank to get a scholarship.”

One day, in response to someone’s sneering question about why she was so desperate about her studies, Dietrich answered in a calm tone. At that moment, Roxanne inadvertently thought that Dietrich’s life was flowing in the exact opposite direction of hers. A life full of expectations, devoid of affection.

‘It seems the baron has high expectations. It must be tough….’

It was sometimes saddening, yet at times, enviable. The ability to meet expectations, to give back as much as one received. Such immature thoughts soon made her feel ashamed, but she couldn’t help being drawn to that image.

Above all, Dietrich seemed not to care that se wasn’t receiving much affection. That always bothered Roxanne. She was the type to exchange a few awkward words and then leave as soon as she could, with a look that said she had no choice. She seemed to be pushed around by those around her, yet no one advanced at their own pace more than she did.

Whenever their eyes met, Dietrich would look away first, and knowing this, Roxanne deliberately didn’t look her way. But sometimes, she wanted to steal a glance at her firm gaze. Even when everyone was against her, she wanted to know how she could stand so centered. That’s how Roxanne thought of Dietrich.

So it’s no surprise that all these moments quickly passed by.

Roxanne was looking at a strange woman who had come to her mother’s grave. It was a very short tradition of commemorating her mother at the end of the autumn festival. It had been Cedric’s custom before Roxanne joined the ducal house, but at some point, Roxanne started joining him.

Beneath strands of graying hair were traces of what used to be raven-black, glossy hair. The woman slowly turned around as Roxanne cautiously inquired about her identity.

“I apologize for the late introduction. I am Victoria Godwin.”

As the woman lifted her head, her face emerged from beneath the black veil. Shallow wrinkles and lips pressed firmly together. Her eyes, unshaken and resolute, yet slightly moist, were a deep navy blue. In that brief moment as she turned to look at the members of the ducal house, Roxanne realized that those firm eyes were steadily watching her.

“Seeing members of the ducal house here, it seems I have found my brother’s grave correctly.”

So it wasn’t strange that Roxanne thought of Dietrich the moment she saw that woman dressed in black mourning clothes.