LIGHTNOVELWORLD Chapter 105 - Intention (3)
Chapter 105. Intention (3)
‘Since the Cao Cao army has already declared war on the Yuan Shu army, heading directly to Chang’an is not an option. So, first, pass through Ji Province and stop by Shangdang Commandery. It’s also a good chance to convey your regards to the Governor of Shangdang.’
Following Liu Bei’s message, Lü Bu and I were currently racing westward without rest.
It had been a while since I had seen the Red Hare, but its speed was still on a completely different level from other horses.
As the fierce wind slapped my face, I quietly closed my eyes.
I wondered what they were doing right now.
When I closed my eyes and tried to picture them, I could still see their smiling faces.
I was particularly worried about Haryeong. We had spent decades as siblings, so if Cao Cao hadn’t delivered my letter, she would be very worried.
I could only hope Unsam and Baekrang were comforting her well.
Additionally, the faces of Cao Cao, Zhao Yun, Zhang Yang, and Sima Yi passed by one by one.
I had no way of knowing what Cao Cao was thinking right now, but I trusted her. She was the one who first raised her voice in the coalition army, and I had believed she was a loyal servant of Han.
Zhao Yun, no matter how she appeared, was a hero in the making and would surely be fine.
Though Zhang Yang was inherently timid, I worried a little about her, but there was a hidden strength within her. If I showed up, she would surely greet me with a smile.
And that little brat Sima Yi, even though she appeared rude on the outside, had the best sense of judgment among them all, making her the most reliable. There was nothing to worry about.
“Hey, dozing off on the saddle, are you?”
“…I wasn’t sleeping.”
“Seriously, then why do you look so grim? Are you planning to kill someone?”
Was it that obvious?
After spending so much time together, she could pick up on things quickly.
“Well, if that vixen has done something stupid, I’ll personally take care of it. So stop making that face. It doesn’t suit you.”
“…”
Well, coming from Lü Bu, those words were reassuring.
I tapped my face a couple of times and opened my eyes wide.
Yeah, meeting them would resolve everything. There was no need to overthink it now.
We continued to speed along.
Our first destination was Shangdang Commandery.
***
…Governor.
…Governor!
…Governor!
– Flash!
Zhang Yang’s consciousness drifted at the loud voice calling her name.
Recently, she often found herself zoning out in this dazed state.
This deeply worried Sugo, who furrowed his brows and cautiously extended a bamboo slip in his hand.
“…Governor.”
“Ah, ah, yes. Sorry, Sugo. Right, we were discussing customs duties.”
Zhang Yang rubbed her forehead and accepted the bamboo slip.
Dark circles under her eyes, thinner cheeks, and unkempt hair.
She hardly looked like someone who held an official position in the Han Dynasty.
“…Are you sure you’re all right? You don’t look well.”
“I’m fine. I’ll take care of it quickly, so wait outside for a bit.”
“But, Governor…”
“I said I’m fine.”
Zhang Yang spoke with a smile. Outwardly, it was a kind smile, but Sugo felt a pang of pain in his chest.
Yes, that was the face of someone on the verge of breaking. Sugo, who had served by her side for years, could tell at a glance.
Sugo felt a sense of sorrow and helplessness.
His lord was struggling so much, yet there was nothing he could do to help.
So, following her words, he simply clasped his hands politely and slowly opened the door.
“Please, don’t overdo it. You are the pillar of Shangdang Commandery.”
“I know. I’m sorry for making you worry unnecessarily.”
After Sugo left, Zhang Yang slowly opened the bamboo slip and began to read.
It contained details about taxes and the distribution of salaries.
She reviewed the contents slowly while moving her brush.
Normally, it was something she could handle quickly, but today her mind just wouldn’t cooperate.
‘…What am I even doing right now…?’
She knew it.
That her current state wasn’t normal.
However, no matter how hard it was, she couldn’t neglect her work; she was responsible for the lives of countless people.
Still, she couldn’t help but struggle to focus.
How could anyone maintain their composure in this situation?
She put the bamboo slip down and opened the window, hoping to catch a breeze.
‘Governor.’
Then suddenly.
A familiar voice reached her ears.
Zhang Yang’s eyes trembled.
‘Governor, you’ve done nothing wrong.’
Why does lingering attachment torment people so?
Whenever the wind brushed by, she vividly remembered the days when Unryong affirmed her.
– Bang!
Unable to bear it, she hastily shut the window.
However, once resurfaced, lingering regrets didn’t fade easily.
Zhang Yang slowly backed away and eventually slumped into her chair.
“No, it’s not true… He’ll be fine… So stop thinking about pointless things…”
Just then, dark blood began to flow from beneath her feet.
It was the blood of the person Zhang Yang had feared the most.
It was so sticky and foul-smelling that it made her frown.
Slowly, very slowly, she looked down.
“…No, it can’t be.”
In her eyes, she saw the figure of a man, covered in blood, lying motionless.
“T-that can’t be…!”
Her breathing grew ragged.
No, it can’t be. But even so…
‘Governor…’
‘What is it, Sugo?’
‘…It seems that the Cao Cao army has sent a messenger. But the contents are…’
The more she recalled, the more her heart felt constricted.
Fragments of negative emotions overwhelmed her.
“W-water…”
Finally, she decided to go outside.
Staying here any longer would make it impossible to maintain her sanity.
– Creak.
Zhang Yang weakly grasped the doorknob and walked on trembling legs.
“Hey, could you bring me some water…?”
A maid, hearing Zhang Yang’s voice, quickly rushed to her side.
“…!”
The maid’s eyes widened in shock.
Zhang Yang didn’t understand why and tilted her head.
“Is there a problem?”
“…G-Governor, why are you crying…? Are you feeling unwell?”
“…Ah.”
Only then did Zhang Yang realize that one side of her cheek was warm, and she quickly bowed her head.
A governor of Shangdang Commandery shouldn’t show such a vulnerable side.
“The water isn’t necessary. You may leave.”
“Y-Yes, ma’am…!”
Watching the maid scurry away, Zhang Yang wiped her eyes.
She then took her steps outside.
There wasn’t any particular reason. She just wanted to escape from this gloomy space.
The glaring sunlight soon burned her retinas.
Her heart felt so heavy and dark, and she could only resent the sky that shined so brightly.
With trembling legs, she walked along the stone wall path, taking deep breaths several times.
A few people, surprised by her appearance, caught glimpses of her as she passed, but none dared to openly comment.
Who would dare say that she looked like a lost puppy?
And then, suddenly.
She stopped in her tracks.
White plum blossoms were tickling her feet.
She once handed him a letter.
That every night when the scent of plum blossoms scattered by the spring breeze brushed her nose, she would think of him.
That, like those blossoms, she would flow and drift, looking forward to the day they would meet again.
That when that time came, they would walk this street together.
Yes, she had said that.
She wanted to see that foolish grin and mischievous smile one more time.
She had wanted to show him this beautiful scenery.
“Hic… Hic…!”
Unable to control her trembling legs, Zhang Yang finally collapsed to the ground.
What a mischievous person he was.
Even then, he hadn’t bothered to send a word.
She had spent days and nights racking her brain over writing that letter, thinking how terribly unfair he was.
“Hic… Ugh…!”
It felt like a gaping hole had torn open in her chest.
It had been months since Unryong’s whereabouts became unclear.
Zhang Yang desperately tried to deny the possibilities, but the atmosphere among Cao Cao’s troops was already akin to having held a funeral.
Zhang Yang continued to deny it.
She denied it, and denied it again.
But now, she had no choice but to accept it.
The fact that she would never see Unryong again.
Only then did Zhang Yang clearly understand what had blossomed in her heart.
The flower of affection that bloomed in the spring breeze had long since reached full bloom.
People gathered around.
Zhang Yang was on the ground, sobbing uncontrollably, and the guards and maids exchanged helpless glances, unsure of what to do.
Then it happened.
“G-Governor!”
Sugo shouted urgently from afar.
As Sugo appeared, the people parted, making way for him.
“Governor!”
“…”
Zhang Yang clutched her dirt-stained skirt and struggled to stand.
“…I-I’m sorry, for showing you such—”
“That’s not the issue!”
“…?”
Sugo had never once interrupted Zhang Yang’s words.
He was the most loyal person within Zhang Yang’s command.
“A guest! There’s a guest here to see you…!”
Judging by how agitated he was, it must have been something serious. Could it be that someone important had come?
Recently, there had been unsavory rumors about Zhang Yang. The pressure had been mounting, and it seemed the time had come.
“…Let them in.”
“Ah, understood!”
Sugo sprinted off at full speed and disappeared.
Zhang Yang let out a faint sigh and brushed the dirt off her clothes.
Before long.
Two figures walked in through the parted crowd.
One was leaning on a cane, and the other had a massive halberd strapped to their back.
However, the peculiar thing was that they were heavily cloaked, hiding their identities beneath their coverings.
Typically, people whose identities were concealed like that would never be allowed into the stronghold…
And Sugo wasn’t one to make such a mistake…
“Hey, why are you still using a cane when your leg’s fine?”
“It’s become a habit.”
“Damn, everything’s a habit now, isn’t it?”
“Do you have to talk like that even here?”
“What, what are they gonna do?”
“Seriously… Just stop talking.”
“Did you just click your tongue?”
And that vulgar tone…
Wait.
Zhang Yang’s head shot up.
Then, she locked eyes with the man leaning on the cane.
“Wow, even though I hid my presence, how did you notice?”
“…Y-you’re…”
The man slowly removed the cloth wrapped around his head.
“It’s been a while, Governor.”
“…”
“Hm? You look like you’ve been through a lot since I last saw you.”
“…”
Zhang Yang slowly stood up.
She gradually picked up her pace.
Then, she lunged!
She tightly embraced the man.
As if cradling something precious.
“W-What the hell, this crazy…!”
Lü Bu shouted.
“…???”
Unryong could only tilt his head as Zhang Yang sobbed into his shoulder.