Jikirukuto: Takoyuki Arc

As Yuki attempted to slink off the stage, her face burning with the effort of maintaining composure, the principal suddenly grabbed the mic.

"Miss Yuki, thank you for your inspiring speech! Now, it's time for our Q&A session."

The words hit Yuki like a thunderclap. Her Hikikomori instincts screamed, Abort mission! Escape immediately! But the entire gymnasium was watching. The doors might as well have been guarded by Cerberus himself. She had no choice.

With a strained smile that didn't reach her eyes, Yuki walked back to the mic stand. "Aha… Sure! Bring it on! What's the worst that could happen, right?" Famous last words.

Question 1: A Brave Student Steps Up

The first student, a girl with glasses, raised her hand. "What's your strategy for succeeding in high school?"

Yuki squinted at her, pretending to read a stream chat. "Ah, great question, user glasses_girl_420! My strategy? Two words: 'Save Scumming.'" She made dramatic air quotes. "That means reloading your save file every time life throws you an L. Oh wait, we can't do that here? Never mind then. Just, uh… don't fail. Next question!"

The crowd chuckled, half in confusion and half in agreement.

Question 2: A Teacher Gets Involved

A stern-looking teacher stepped forward. "What advice do you have for managing stress while keeping up with assignments?"

Yuki leaned into the mic. "Oh, user strict_teacher_senpai! Stress management is easy. Just pretend your deadlines don't exist until the last possible second, then panic! Procrastination builds character. And if that fails, cry in the shower. Works every time!" She gave a thumbs-up.

The teacher frowned, but some students in the back hollered, "Same!"

Question 3: The Principal Asks Something Serious

The principal adjusted their glasses and smiled. "What do you think is the most important quality a student should have?"

Yuki scratched her chin dramatically, pretending to ponder. "Hmm, good one, user big_boss_principal! I'd say the most important quality is… plot armor. You know, the thing that protects the protagonist in every anime no matter how dumb their decisions are? Unfortunately, we don't have that, so… let's just go with 'luck.' Yeah, lots of luck. And maybe coffee."

The principal blinked in confusion, unsure whether to laugh or scold her.

Question 4: A Class Clown Chimes In

A guy from the back yelled, "What's your type?!"

Without missing a beat, Yuki smirked. "Ah, user desperate_dude69420! My type is… unavailable. Next!"

The gym exploded with laughter. The guy slumped in his seat, defeated but smiling.

Question 5: The Overly Serious Student

A serious-looking student raised his hand. "What do you think is the key to balancing academics and extracurriculars?"

Yuki mimed typing on an invisible keyboard. "Oh, look at this high-level question, chat! tryhard_student.exe has entered the chat. Balancing school and extracurriculars? Easy. Just… don't. Who needs balance when you can choose chaos? Focus on what you like, and if anyone complains, tell them it's for your character development arc. Boom. Problem solved."

Question 6: The Unexpected Curveball

A younger student stood up nervously. "If you were an anime character, what genre would your life be?"

Yuki's face lit up. "Finally, a good question, user baby_anime_fan! My life is obviously a slice-of-life, comedy, horror, psychological thriller, with a sprinkle of isekai vibes. Basically, it's every genre mashed into one, and none of it makes sense. Just like high school! Next!"

The Final Question: A Wild Teacher with a Trap Question

A smiling teacher asked, "What's your plan for the future, Miss Yuki?"

The smile on Yuki's face faltered for a split second, but she quickly recovered. "Ah, user trap_teacher_69! My plan for the future is simple: survive. Just like in any battle royale game. Drop in, scavenge what you can, avoid getting knocked out, and maybe, just maybe, you'll be the last one standing. And if not, at least you tried, right?" She flashed a peace sign.

The Unexpected Ending

As the crowd burst into applause, Yuki finally stepped back, drenched in sweat but smiling through the chaos.

The principal clapped politely. "Thank you for your… creative answers, Miss Yuki. I'm sure the students have learned a lot."

Yuki muttered under her breath, Yeah, they learned that I'm a certified disaster.

As she left the stage, the entire school erupted into cheers. Some students were already quoting her lines, while others debated whether she was a genius or completely unhinged.

Yuki, meanwhile, collapsed onto a bench outside the gym, groaning. This is it. My reputation is ruined. I'll never recover from this.

But deep down, another part of her smirked. Or maybe… this is just the beginning.