Monochrome Paradox

He was on the precipice of a breakthrough, and as he looked at the deepness of the void, Ming Ran searched endlessly for what insight he was lacking. He had felt much closer to the void— the vast emptiness that embodied the collection of absolute knowledge, eternal collections of wisdom, and the absolute truth— than most might. Or maybe there were many people who felt close to the collection of the origin, maybe that is what it meant to be wise or what it was to have knowledge or to find the slivers of the shattered truth come together in this world. Maybe it was what made the judges, the wiseman, the shaman, the miracle doctors, the sage emperors, the geniuses, the people who stood as pillars to the universe. Yet there was something in Ming Ran that connected him to the void. There was something that made his existence absolutely nothing. Sometimes he could feel it infiltrating a place in his soul, bringing the void closer to him. As the void was a place of nothing— a collection of endless burnt out something— he should probably be much more afraid, what would happen if he ceased to exist in this world? Yet, there was something almost calming about being so close to that place, a cradle that seemed to be much safer than the world at large or in the bosom of even Wei Ning. Yet, it was the sense of ease that Ming Ran felt around that boy that pulled him back from the void every single time. He would find the people there that he had nearly forgotten— as he came close to becoming nothing and everything— whether it was Fa Lin who taught him to write— mercilessly fixing the flaws in his brushstrokes, but also dotingly bringing him pieces of taffy. Or maybe he would find Gong June who would tuck him under her arm and flee with him to tow, vaulting over the walls of the manor and laughing like a maniac as they listened to the cries of the servants and nannies that were supposed to be watching him. They would go to the marketplace and she would buy him whatever he wanted, trying her best to get him to call her Jiejie. Khan Qing would join them and all of them together would go to the gambling den, where she would win big in mahjong or go. Maybe it was Ming Cheng who often brought both of his brothers out to play at the barracks, making sure that they each had something to do, and bringing them to a restaurant afterwards where they would eat good food together. All of them were healthy, happy, and arguably safe. There was nothing to worry about there, and the strong pull he felt to watching them and being with them made him watch more. The more he interacted with them, the more he felt at home. 

Now, he had found a sense of understanding. There was a large part of him that was stuck somewhere, and he had no way of knowing how to dislodge his foot from the gnarled roots keeping hold of him. Thus, he sat on his bed one spring day, unraveling that sense of understanding that was hidden deep inside his soul. The knowledge, wisdom, and absolute truth was like freezing water, and the further he waded inside the slower his mind would work, and the further he got from his physical self. The smell of wet trees from the last of the spring showers, the smell of the city on the horizon that carried over to him, and the horrible stench of blood, the life that dripped down and that soaked the very air and foundations of this place. Yet, Ming Ran could feel an aloof coldness welling up within at the thought of this place— another piece of reality, another truth that could not be denied. 

"And so, what is this place to you?"

"The Hunting Grounds."

"What about those lights in the distance?"

"The City."

"And? What is this place to you?"

"A place where the cycle ends, a truth of the world that all must accept."

"And? Do you? Accept it?"

"It is simply a part of reality. Some are destined to end up on this path."

"Then, why do you place such importance on this place?"

"This is where my foot is stuck."

"Can you feel your foot?"

"…I'm not sure. I am human, I should have a foot, shouldn't I? No. Not all. Did I… have a foot?"

"What does your foot look like?"

"Ah. It looks like this." Ming Ran looked up at Cang Yuan and smiled, pointing to his foot. He felt the waters recede and the knowledge of who he was seep back into his soul where it belonged. 

"That's right. Now, it's time to come back, he is going to have a heart attack."

Opening his eyes, the first thing he saw was a white, furry tail. Ming Ran caressed it gently, eliciting a soft chuckle from the creature. 

"I can see why my student is so taken with you." a fox looked down at him with bright, blue eyes. A long, wet tongue brushed lightly passed his cheek. Ming Ran reached up and pet the nose lightly. There was a rustling sound on the other side of the door. 

"Just give us a minute." the fox chided. The door burst open revealing Ming Quan who rushed forward and held Ming Ran close. 

"Little One!!! Ah, are you alright?!" he cluttered his face in kisses, and hugged him close. Ming Cheng swung his fist down.

"Did you not hear Cang-Daoshi tell you to wait?" He gave a respectful bow and dragged his brother out. "Please excuse us." Cang Yuan sighed and shook his head, shifting his appearance back into a human. 

"Youngsters these days are so impatient!" he turned to Ming Ran and raised an eye brow, "And? How did you end up in the Spring of Origins?" he sighed, shaking his head, "No, don't answer. I think I understand a bit, and you probably won't be able to answer me as you are anyhow." He paced about the room for a time, "Do not dip your toes in that place again. You almost lost yourself to it. While it is a place to return to at the end of one life, it is no place for those currently with being. Live through this life and bring something back to the Spring when the time comes. Absolute knowledge and wisdom is not something that should exist in the mortal world. Do not ever tell anyone you still have a connection to it."