Namgung Se-ga, the warrior, was reincarnated in Romance

I sat across from Ruber in the sitting room of my chamber.

He was still tense just before entering the room, breathing heavily, but after finishing a cup of tea and biting into a cookie, he finally calmed down.

I couldn’t help but think that he must have never visited a friend’s room before—it seemed both pitiful and cute.

He had mentioned that he wanted to talk, so it was only right to wait patiently, as any adult would. I sat back and munched on a cookie, waiting for a while. The only sound in the quiet room was the faint crunching of the cookie.

When I had eaten my third cookie, Ruber carefully opened his mouth.

“About… marriage between men.”

“Yes.”

“I think it’s… something necessary.”

“Why?”

He tightly closed his eyes and opened them again.

“If two people love each other, then it wouldn’t be right for someone else to say… that it isn’t love.”

“I see.”

Love. What exactly is it?

I sank deeper into the sofa. The soft and high-quality couch supported my body comfortably and gave a warm feeling. As I looked at Ruber, I naturally lowered my gaze.

Ruber seemed a bit embarrassed.

“…Is that all?”

“Yes?”

“I… I want to hear what Ernhardt-senior thinks about it.”

I didn’t answer right away.

I was thinking about how to respond. It took me a moment to organize my thoughts. Noticing that Ruber seemed thirsty, I reached out and refilled his tea cup.

“To be honest, it’s not my issue, so I don’t think about it much.”

“…Because it’s not your issue?”

“Yes. I just listen to my senior’s words, and they seem right to me.”

I paused for a moment. Ruber was as trustworthy as Sheyden. He was a companion. I gathered my thoughts and spoke calmly.

“As I said before… I’ve never considered having a partner in my life. I’ve had vague thoughts about wanting children, but even that idea has faded now.”

“….”

“I enjoy becoming stronger, and I feel proud when others expect things from me. I often think about becoming a strong warrior and making my name known.”

“….”

“But, after entering the academy, I saw so many shy and beautiful children.”

“What?”

“Like seniors.”

“Ugh.”

Ruber inhaled sharply. I couldn’t help but laugh. The shy look on his face was so cute, it made my fingertips tingle.

In any case, the gentle, docile, and delicate ones stayed in my mind, never leaving.

I gazed at his flushed cheeks for a moment before continuing.

“I thought it was so beautiful to see them whispering love, sharing affection, and saying they liked each other. I was envious… But I still don’t think I could have that kind of love. Because I…”

I took a sip of tea to wet my mouth and choose my words carefully.

“I grew old in my heart earlier than others. It’s just the way I was born in this life.”

“….”

“I once found out that two men I knew were deeply in love with each other. I was shocked. Even though I knew it wasn’t something I should be involved in or worry about… it was confusing.”

“….”

“It was something I didn’t know, something unfamiliar. Like an animal jumping back when it first sees fire…”

“….”

“But some birds start fires to catch food. Once you understand where the fire comes from, you no longer need to be afraid. I learned that there’s no shame in being proud of it.”

“…What do you mean?”

“Loving someone for who they are, without regard to gender.”

Ruber silently held his tea cup with both hands and held his breath. I looked directly into his dark eyes, which now gleamed with a sharp clarity.

I was sharing with him the fragments of insight I had gained. It was a fulfilling feeling. I smiled again.

“I think it might be something to envy.”

I noticed that the cookie jar was empty.

As my hand fumbled for the empty bowl, Ruber carefully offered me the cookie he had taken a bite of but had not eaten any further.

Recognizing that he hesitated, I accepted the cookie without hesitation and took a bite. Sharing food was something I was used to from my past life, when I often went hungry.

“There are still things I can’t fully accept in my heart,” Ruber said quietly.

“…What things, exactly?”

“Well… It’s like, showing intimate contact to others. I still think that such things should be kept private and are somewhat taboo, but hearing that it’s their situation… I suppose I’ll have to change my thinking.”

Ruber became quiet again, and after speaking, I felt relieved.

It was like when I used to study, explaining things to other students to clarify my thoughts—it always helped me understand better.

After speaking, I felt embarrassed for making a big deal out of something so trivial.

I spoke calmly.

“If there’s something I can help with, I will. If it’s something I should avoid, I’ll leave it alone without saying anything. But if it’s something unjust, I’ll want to intervene.”

“Unjust…?”

“I don’t know yet. It’s just vague for now.”

“….”

Ruber was silent. After three breaths, he whispered.

“…I like this side of Ernhardt-senior.”

“I quite like you too, senior.”

I reassured him, saying there was nothing to worry about.

Ruber quietly finished his tea and said he would go to bed now. I hoped that, like me, his heart would feel lighter too.

I saw him to the door of the dormitory.

Yes, when I thought it through carefully, there was nothing that didn’t make sense.

I had simply found out that Walter, the young boy, was deeply in love.

Calips Agrizent, on the other hand, was obviously an excellent and reliable adult. It was not surprising that a boy from a complicated family situation would fall for someone with such a gentle demeanor.

So, I planned to wait for the right opportunity to have a private talk with Professor Calips Agrizent. When an adult and a child meet, it is naturally the adult who should think things through and reflect.

I believed that Calips would provide a proper answer, but I also felt an urge to intervene in their situation, especially because of the scar on his neck.

Whenever I thought of the faint scar on the professor’s delicate neck, I felt uneasy.

Does age always equate to strength?

I was worried about both Walter and Calips.

If Walter was using force to pressure Calips, I could help with force as well. If, on the other hand, Calips was playing with Walter, I could try to stop him with kind words.

Wasn’t it much like the situation with Danbi and Marianne?

A relationship that is recognized by peers and those around them is a safer path.

But what about Walter and Calips?

I hoped they wouldn’t get hurt while standing on this uncertain path. I couldn’t forget Walter’s snarled face, and the painful, guttural growl of his voice.

It’s common for someone who is good to me to be bad to others. People always have multiple faces.

I understood that love is incredibly important to the people of Sieron, but I didn’t think one should blindly accept the wounds a partner might give.

A sigh escaped me.

***

Saturday of the first week of the new semester.

I had grown tall enough that my uniform became tight, so I had measured myself again just before the semester started.

I had specifically requested that my new uniform be made with extra room, so on Saturday morning, the shirt was loose.

I folded the cuffs of the pants and pinned them, then put on the jacket, making it much easier to move around. Satisfied, I nodded to myself.

With my study materials in hand, I headed to the library.

Ruber, who was waiting for me in his usual spot, stared at me without saying a word. When I asked why, he shook his head, but his behavior seemed suspicious.

Curious and puzzled, I urged him to answer.

“Why are you staring at me like that?”

“Well… um… you got a new uniform.”

“Yes.”

“It looks good on you…”

“It’s the same as yours, just with a different fit. You’re just saying unnecessary things.”

But even with his compliments, I couldn’t help but smile. I laughed for a moment and opened my book.

I was simply reviewing what we had learned last week and previewing what we would learn next week. I didn’t need to memorize every unfamiliar sentence right away, but I knew that after reading carefully several times, the knowledge would naturally settle in my mind.

After studying, I had a meal with Ruber, did a quick sparring session for digestion, and then we parted ways.

The same happened on Sunday. I coincidentally ran into Sheiden, who seemed worried about me, but I didn’t get a chance to hear his reasons.

I suddenly thought I should bring up the fact that the Duke of Valentia was supporting the second prince to Sheiden.

I wanted to help everyone around me live peacefully and happily, fulfilling everything they wanted. It was something I hoped for, something I didn’t achieve in my past life.

Without realizing it, a bitter feeling crept up inside me. I quickly shook off the thought.

I was grateful for Ruber, who was always able to block my sword strikes. I didn’t want to hold back my kind words, so I kept repeating how thankful I was to have him by my side.

Ruber shyly nodded, and I habitually reached out to ruffle his hair. Each time I did, I felt a pleasant warmth from his soft hair.

My troubled heart felt warm and light.

If this boy liked me because of my swordsmanship, I felt that the path I was walking on was the right one.

A sudden desire to stand before this child and become someone worthy of him sprouted within me. Deep in my heart, something rose up, a small voice declaring, “I’m here.”

Step by step, I thought. The voice of Maelo Sanson echoed in my mind.

Yes, I should start by clearing away the stones at my feet.