No Dark Secrets In This Book

Episode 62

My head felt like it was going to explode, so I stayed awake the whole night. 

‘Hey guys, listen…’

Don’t you think this is too much, even if you think about it?

I admit that I almost fell in love. But isn’t it too much to fall out of love as soon as you fall in love? No, this isn’t even on the level of falling out of love in the first place.

‘I fell in love with someone who’s trying to kill me, what a cheap melodrama.’

If the world had a conscience, it shouldn’t do this to me. Damn God or whatever.

‘Do you have to screw me over this badly…?’

But I can’t escape from reality forever.

If Ryuseong really is a regressor, and he’s watching to see if he should kill me or not, then I need to come to my senses soon.

I need to find the only way to protect myself… but how do I do that?

That’s right. I was faced with a huge problem. My life has always been shitty, but every time I see Ryuseong sleeping next to me, my heart races and I’m refilled with an additional shitty feeling.

‘No, why the hell did he have to be so handsome and make me fall for him, that bastard?’

Just looking down at him made me feel good. Even though I thought it wasn’t like that before, to the point where I thought this emotion, whether it’s affection or love, is really something else, he looked so damn handsome that it drove me crazy. To the point where I didn’t give a damn that he was trying to kill me.

But that doesn’t mean I can just hand over my sovereignty to love or whatever.

‘I have my pride.’

What is love that it can control me?

Of course, many people who loved me were happy to be controlled.

But that’s not me. I like to shake things up, not be shaken.

‘Oh, was this karma?’

Is my life’s karma insulting me right now?

At that moment, Ryuseong opened his eyes with a frown, not even imagining what kind of nonsense I was thinking inside. His blue eyes were as pretty as a lake, and I liked myself reflected in them. No, damn it. What’s there to like? This is crazy. Unable to overcome the deep regret, I slapped my cheek and Ryuseong looked at me like I was a madman.

After awkwardly exchanging glances, I coughed a few times, feeling embarrassed about going crazy in the morning.

Then Ryuseong slowly asked,

“…Are you in your right mind?”

Is this bastard mocking me? His words are ambiguous.

“Yes, well.”

“Last night…”

Damn it. I finally remembered last night, which I hadn’t realized while being shocked by the fact that Ryuseong was a regressor.

The pale shadows. The sobbing night. I couldn’t do anything but cry like a child. The kiss we shared then was more of a cry for help than a kiss. Unlike now, I wasn’t in my right mind then.

So I don’t know what he’s going to say….

“Forget it. I’ll forget it too.”

“….”

But it seems this bastard has manners. He understood that I wanted to forget it and said let’s pretend it never happened. Damn it… I should feel good, but strangely, I feel so bad that I feel like I’m going to die. I was a fool for being comforted by you. I was a sucker for believing that I could be comforted in your arms. Such thoughts keep welling up.

“…Why do you have that expression?”

…Well, that’s the thing. I don’t know what I want either.

I don’t know if I’m happy or if I feel betrayed by you. Who am I to feel betrayed by you? No, no. No. I have the right to feel betrayed. What if you caress me as if you like me, and then say that I was someone you were going to kill? Not that I like you, but… Argh!

But the next moment, the touch on my cheek was kind and warm. So much that I felt like I was going crazy.

“Because I thought you would hate it.”

“….”

“That’s why I said it.”

The whisper that if it’s okay to remember, I won’t forget it, made my eyes sting again. This must be puberty, no matter how I think about it. Just like how the sound of falling leaves makes me laugh, just Ryuseong breathing makes me want to cry. Let’s just go with that. I’ll go crazy if I don’t.

You say you’re going to kill me, but why are you so kind…?

‘Since it’s come to this, I need to come up with a survival plan.’

I looked up at him blankly with a poker face and thought to myself with a smirk.

If I leave this wretched guy alone, I feel like I’ll be enchanted and give him my liver and gall bladder. Let’s define the rules I need to follow one by one in order to survive.

‘First, thoroughly rely on family background!’

No matter how I think about it, this bastard seems to be unable to kill me because he’s conscious of the family.

In short, let’s say he’s a regressor. Then to him, I’m the one who destroyed the world. Is it a big deal to kill such a son of a bitch? Take him anywhere and stab him, and you save the world and get revenge, great.

But the reason he can’t do that is probably because he knows what it would mean to Demillang to kill Demillang’s son. All-out war. Bloody revenge. Etc. He probably didn’t want to see the relationship between Hanrapa and Demillang go sour. Ryuseong is not the type to let his family get hurt because of him.

And if Ryuseong is being conscious of Demillang, I should say “thank you.”

Because that’s the reason my lifeline is still attached.

‘But we’re roommates? Damn it.’

It’s the perfect opportunity to kill me, isn’t it?

Well, but if a murder happens in the room, the first suspect would be the roommate, so I probably won’t be killed on campus.

In other words, I just need to prevent him from planning the perfect crime.

Usually, just showing off that I’m Demillang’s son can serve as a warning.

‘Second, pretend to have no interest in world destruction!’

This might be a bit difficult.

Because it’s hard for me to distinguish which actions are related to world destruction.

But maybe if I pretend to love the world a little, something will change. You know, pretending to be good.

I can’t make the family suspicious, so I’ll have to take the middle road, but anyway, let’s do something that looks bad at first glance but has good results.

Those are just vague and uncertain assumptions.

‘Ah, honestly, I really don’t know what to do. How can I pretend to be good with my personality? Should I just contribute to world peace through demon raids?’

Hmm, this is good. Should I plan to do some volunteer work and a few rounds of demon raids during the break?

‘…What wouldn’t I do to avoid dying?’

Then next…

‘Third, get stronger… so that if things go wrong, I can kill Ryuseong and everyone else.’

…That’s how I can decide.

Isn’t that right? What is love that I have to die for it? I don’t care about love or whatever, if he tries to kill me, I will kill him. That was my resolve. No wonder.

It’s shitty to just take it lying down, isn’t it?

‘…You didn’t have to let me know so cruelly that you hate me…’

I need to get a grip.

But since a clouded person’s heart can’t clear easily, I decided to be a gloomy Cassice Demillang for the time being. I resolved to blatantly express a gloomy and sharp atmosphere, as if declaring that no one should mess with me.

Of course, it may not be a good thing for a superior to give attitude to a subordinate. But my first love says he’s going to kill me, and my report card comes out today. Give me a break.

‘If I’m not depressed, am I even human…?’

Tsk, let’s stop with the nonsense about first love.

Conservatively approaching it, top 20. That seems to be the maximum grade. The difficulty of the test was hellish this time, and I stumbled a few times in the separate practical exams.

The other kids seem to have royally failed the written exam, but would they have failed the practical more than me, who started fresh from Fireball? I pretended to use only blood magic and shamelessly acted like it, but the professors’ expressions were so twisted as if they were horrified. It was really bad.

In total, I have to discard the optimistic future prospect that my grades will be good.

‘They’re the kids below. How could they not study well?’

Ugh, just thinking about how people will mock me, saying how my grades turned out like this, makes my stomach ache sharply. But if I suppress them with status, I can somehow smooth it over, right?

With that thought, I walked steadily towards the grade sheet posted on the school wall like a banner. Honestly, I was so anxious and had an ominous feeling that my mind was filthy, and I had no energy to be rude. But when the subordinates next to me said Demillang was here and told people to move, the path naturally opened.

Truly the strongest personality group. I acknowledge it.

But even with the path open, I didn’t have the courage to go in and look. Especially when I saw the students who checked their grades looking at me like they saw a ghost.

‘Did I really bomb my grades?’

Did I do that badly?

***

Areah Academy publicly executes students’ grades. Transparently showing what kind of magic from which faction they used for the performance evaluation and what score they got.

They say they disclose it for fair grading since not all students will use elemental magic in the same way, but from the students’ perspective, it’s a humiliating experience of having their skills exposed.

Especially this time, the written exam was said to be unprecedentedly hellish in difficulty.

The speculations of the seniors that the difficulty was raised to match the standards of the naturally gifted Ryuseong and Cassice of Demillang did not console the pitiful first-year students. In the end, what remains in the future is the cruel report card. That was all.

And most of all…

“How did he get perfect scores using only blood magic…?”

“Is he even human…?”

In the world, there was a being who got perfect scores with magic he learned less than a year ago, unlike them.

That’s what brought tears to the students’ eyes.

Mastering the mysterious heritage accumulated over lofty years to the point where professors are appalled to see it in less than a year? If that was possible for all humans, they wouldn’t have struggled against the “Black Fog” for a thousand years.

In short, it was not a level of control that humans could achieve.

‘Demillang, Demillang, they kept saying… It was true.’

‘I thought the rumors were exaggerated, but they were an understatement. I didn’t know he would be such an outstanding figure…’

The admiration bordering on awe or fear was translated into the unprecedented score of all A’s.

And everyone naturally made way for the aristocratic young man elegantly walking in through the path they opened.

The blood mage who drove students to wailing and self-loathing.

Cassice Demillang.

“Hmm…”

He quietly looks up at the grade sheet from the bottom. Wherever Cassice Demillang’s purple eyes land, students flinch and feel pain. Why is he looking up from the bottom? Is he trying to draw out more tears from the students for no reason?

Eventually, Cassice tilts his head as if puzzled. Some students suffer great heartache at that gesture. Some students fled to the infirmary, scattering tears, for fear that he would ask why such scores exist in the world.

And up, up…

When his gaze finally reached the spot where the name of the top student was written, Cassice Demillang…

“–Ha.”

He let out a scornful laugh.

As if sneering that the students’ level is so trivial.

It was a sound that stabbed like a dagger.

***

‘Damn, I’m so relieved.’

It seems I’m the only one who survived the fire test.

I looked from the bottom because I was afraid of being last, but I got 1st place! Ahh. All the accumulated fatigue is gone. On one hand, I wondered if I was dreaming that I beat the protagonist, but it seems Ryuseong taking the mana subject and getting minus points had a big impact. Most of all, the practical saved me. I was nervous because of the professors’ expressions, but I guess it was no big deal. Anyway, huge gain.

‘I survived. Yay!’

…But why are the kids crying so much?

Are they all sad that they failed the test…?

“Whew…”

“…!”

I can only sigh. No matter how high the educational fever is at Areah, grades aren’t everything…

“Tsk tsk…”

“…!”