Percy Jackson - Beyond the Gods

After leaving his cabin, Ikki walked toward the Big House while reflecting on the brief conversation he had just had with Thalia.

He felt he could be better in many ways.

Bitterness filled his chest.

He could understand Thalia's anger; her mannerisms and selfishness always put her in a position where she seemed superior to everyone around her, as if things didn't affect her, and he was merely a pragmatic observer. He only took the reins when situations spiraled out of others' control, as if he was obligated to…

And deep down, he knew it was true. Since he was reborn in this world, all he had done was observe. There had been no greater ambition in his actions. He wanted to reach the peak of this world, yes, but what had he done to achieve that? Everything had been handed to him on a silver platter. His efforts were merely the result of something he had gained by being born into this world: his perfect appearance, his almost transcendental powers. They weren't acquired through genuine effort, through trial and error. It all seemed almost too easy—creating techniques, magic, and powerful scripts. He could assume it was due to his genius, but he felt unworthy of such a claim. He was certain it was all thanks to the [Nameless Manual] in his mind. Without it, he wouldn't have achieved even one percent of his current accomplishments.

Although he no longer remembered his past life as a price, he knew he had been a failure. How could someone so defeated reach the point of facing gods and legendary monsters with such ease?

But what sickened him most about himself was the unfulfilled promises. He had wanted to protect his mother from monsters and gods, but he couldn't even do that. Why hadn't he made a magical item, a talisman, or something to protect her while he was away? The truth was, he had done something—a necklace he gave his mother as a gift—but that was all. It hadn't been enough. If he were as clever as he imagined, he could have created some contingency plan...

It all pointed to how much of a failure he was...

He had made so many mistakes that those who called him perfect would see he was just a mere human. Regret consumed his heart.

His inaction had brought him problems, his arrogance had brought him problems, his personality had brought him problems. He thought himself intelligent, but his actions lacked basic logic. He believed himself powerful, yet he couldn't save the people he wanted to save. He was powerless before destiny...

And he paid the highest possible price for his actions.

He lost the most important person in his life.

If he had killed Luke the moment he saw him—or at least tried to rid the boy of Kronos' influence—he wouldn't have lost his mother.

If he had gone to Los Angeles alone to find Hades, the mission to recover his father's symbol of power would have been different. His friends wouldn't have been in danger, and he would have taken full responsibility for his powers.

His decisions had painful consequences, and he was still making the same mistakes...

Recent memories of the journey back to camp filled his mind.

The conversation with Thalia only made it clearer, her anger a reminder of his stupidity. The irony was that he thought himself clever, but his decisions were truly useless...

Deep down, he knew it was a reflection of his past life. He didn't consider himself worthy enough to get involved in great things. He was merely someone useless who had received everything to become stronger and better, but, due to his nature, was incapable of it...

A long sigh escaped his lips.

Even now, secretly in his heart, he justified the hatred he felt for himself.

Although he could teleport back to Camp Half-Blood with everyone, he hadn't because he was understanding the concept of "magic" to form his own divinity. The process of filling the void with a concept or law strangely rendered him incapable of using it for numerous feats. In other words, understanding the concept of "magic" prevented him from using any type of spell or skill that depended on it. Even the mana converted by his "source" was swallowed by the void of his Divinity, which was slowly taking shape.

Thanks to the memories of two great mages, his understanding of the concept had almost reached one hundred percent. He was certain he would undergo a qualitative change when that happened, and his inability to use "magic" would cease to exist.

The issue was that the "Conceptual Void" within him was something he didn't understand well, so it wasn't an excuse for his inactivity. Thus, it was a valid argument for opposing the self-hatred he felt.

But there was no way to justify his inactivity in taking the Sun God's chariot and bringing everyone to safety. He regretted that. He tried to justify it as his nature, but it didn't change the fact that he had made another mistake.

This time, it would be the last...

He had spent a year obsessed with a goal, and though he had found a way to achieve it, there had been no change in himself. He needed to change; there were no other options now...

The conversation with Thalia, her anger at him, made that even clearer. No more excuses...

Ikki continued walking toward the Big House. Along the way, some campers who saw him stopped to greet him and chat briefly. After bidding them farewell, he resumed his path.

When he was almost at the Big House, he saw a girl he had become friends with during his first year at Camp Half-Blood. Katie, a daughter of Demeter, was walking calmly, having just left the Big House. Based on what he had noticed earlier, he assumed she had been to the infirmary.

Katie was a sixteen-year-old girl with black hair and brown eyes. She had an extremely charming and striking appearance, her body possessing curves that could make any man lose focus. She wore the Camp Half-Blood shirt, leggings that highlighted her figure, and a fur-lined jacket over her shirt. She also had a green scarf to shield her from the cold.

When she saw him, she seemed surprised...

"Ikki?" The girl's brown eyes sparkled as a faint blush rose to her cheeks. Her voice was soft but carried genuine surprise: "I can't believe it... You're back!"

"Katie..." Ikki looked at her, a slight smile forming on his lips—the kind of smile that always made people's hearts race and took their breath away. He spoke gently: "It's been a while, hasn't it?"

"One year..." Katie said, crossing her arms for a moment before uncrossing them and taking a few hesitant steps toward him: "An entire year. No news, nothing. What happened to you?"

"It's a long story." Ikki ran a hand through his black hair, his gaze shifting momentarily before returning to her: "And I'm sorry for not keeping in touch. It wasn't my intention to worry anyone..."

In his selfishness, he hadn't even considered reaching out to his friends or giving them any news. It made him feel sick to think about how foolish he had been.

"Not to worry?" Katie raised an eyebrow, crossing her arms again, this time in a more defensive posture: "Ikki, everyone was worried. And when I say everyone, I mean everyone. Even the Stoll brothers stopped pulling pranks for a while..."

At the end of her words, she sighed: "I was... worried too..."

"I know..." Ikki took a step closer, his expression growing more serious: "And I'm sorry for that. I needed time. It wasn't fair to you all..."

"It certainly wasn't..." Katie hesitated, observing him for a moment. Her feelings for him had always been a mix of admiration and something deeper, something she had never had the courage to admit: "But I'm glad you're back. Really..."

"Thank you, Katie..." Ikki offered a half-smile, a smile that seemed to light up the space around him: "I'm happy to be back too..."

"So, what are you going to do now?" She tilted her head, curious. Noticing the direction he was heading, she guessed: "I mean, besides talking to Chiron?"

"First, sort things out with Chiron." Ikki shrugged, unsurprised that she had deduced his imminent conversation with Chiron. He continued: "After that, I think I need to readjust to camp. Has much changed?"

"Not much..." Katie smiled, relaxing a bit more: "Except, of course, for the Stoll brothers. They put chocolate Easter bunnies on the roof of the Demeter cabin. We're still trying to figure out how to get them down without damaging the roof..."

"That sounds like something they'd do." Ikki seemed amused by the story. He glanced at her and asked: "You still don't like them much, do you?"

"Let's just say our relationship is... complicated." She smiled back, her usual sarcasm surfacing: "But they're not the worst problem in the world..."

"And you?" He tilted his head, asking calmly: "How have you been?"

"I'm okay." Katie shrugged, though there was a slight hesitation in her voice: "I mean, as okay as one can be in a camp for demigods, dealing with monsters and all the rest..."

"Seems like not much has changed, then..." Ikki gave a faint smile, feeling a bittersweet emotion in his heart. He missed moments like these—chatting with his friends...

Katie looked at him, and although a blush rose slightly on her cheeks, she smiled as she asked: "But what about you? How was this year away? What happened?"

"It was... complicated." Ikki sighed, running a hand through his hair again: "It wasn't an easy decision, but it was something I needed to do. I promise I'll tell you everything, just... not now..."

"Alright." Katie nodded slowly, though curiosity still shone in her eyes: "I'll hold you to that promise..."

"And I'll keep it." Ikki held her gaze, sincerity clear in his voice: "Thank you for understanding, Katie. It means a lot to me..."

"Of course." She smiled, feeling a bit more at ease by his side: "And, in the meantime, if you need help readjusting, I'm here..."

"I appreciate it." He glanced toward the Big House in the distance before turning back to her: "Well, I need to face our dear immortal centaur. See you later, Katie..."

"See you later, Ikki..." Katie said, also wanting to head on her way. She had gone to the infirmary to fetch some ambrosia for one of her sisters who had been injured. Remembering this, she quickened her steps. Although her sister's injury wasn't serious, she still felt bad for putting the matter aside due to her own selfish desires—talking to Ikki after a year had taken up almost all her focus...

Her heart raced as she thought about it...

As the girl ran toward the Demeter Cabin, Ikki continued walking toward the Big House.

The Big House was decorated with strands of yellow and red fireballs that warmed the porch without setting anything ablaze. Inside, flames crackled in the fireplace. The air smelled of hot chocolate, and he walked directly into the room.

His attention was briefly caught by the sense of serenity and tradition the room exuded, with its white walls adorned with delicate friezes and Doric columns supporting the high ceiling.

The floor was polished marble, reflecting the soft light from the oil lamps hanging in bronze holders. A large, carved stone fireplace warmed the room, and the scent of burning pine mixed with the fragrance of fresh flowers arranged in ceramic vases scattered around the space. At the center of the room, a sturdy oak table was covered with a cloth embroidered with Greek patterns. Seated around it were Chiron and Dionysus, silently playing cards. Chiron, always composed, observed the game with a calm expression, while Dionysus frowned, his fingers lightly drumming on the table, as if the game were the only thing that mattered in the world.

Chiron's brown beard was scruffier in the winter. His curly hair had grown a bit longer. He wore a fluffy sweater with a hoof print design and had a blanket on his lap that almost completely hid the wheelchair.

When he entered, both men noticed his arrival.

"Ah, Ikki, my boy..." Chiron smiled as he saw Zeus's son walking toward him. He looked relieved: "It's good to see you well after a year without news. Sit down; we have much to discuss..."

Ikki looked at the immortal centaur. At that moment, it was as if a wave of memories hit him all at once. It had been a year since he was last there, and now, back again, he felt like a stranger in his own home. Slowly, he approached and sat opposite Chiron, his eyes focusing on the cards the two immortal men held on the table, but his mind was elsewhere. He decided he would be honest this time and not omit what had happened a year ago.

As the boy prepared for the impending conversation, Chiron felt relieved. During the year Ikki was gone, he never stopped worrying. And now that he was finally back, though Chiron felt relief, he also noted a certain change in the boy—the shadow of pain in his eyes, the invisible weight he carried on his shoulders.

After a moment of silence, Chiron asked:

"So, my boy. Could you explain the reason for your disappearance? We were all worried about you..." His voice was warm, laden with genuine concern, though his eyes showed more than just casual interest.

Ikki averted his gaze from the cards and looked at Chiron, speaking with a sigh: "I... needed time. A lot happened."

Mr. D, without taking his eyes off the cards, murmured, trying to sound indifferent but lacking his usual sarcasm: "Yes, time... always a good excuse." He placed a card on the table with more care than usual, casting a furtive glance at Ikki, as if assessing his reaction.

Despite his irreverent and sarcastic façade, he was a god who deeply understood the nuances of the human and demigod mind. As the god of wine, festivities, and—more importantly—madness, he knew better than anyone how fragile the balance between sanity and chaos could be. The meeting on Olympus, a year ago, had been a turning point for him, especially when Ikki Phoenix, the son of Zeus, displayed a power that made the entire Olympus tremble.

When he spoke, his voice echoed through the hall, not just as words but as a visceral force that shook Olympus itself. There was a dark, uncontrollable energy within him—a force teetering on the edge of danger. To Dionysus, it wasn't just an impassioned speech from a demigod. It was a glimpse of what could happen if Ikki allowed himself to be consumed by rage.

He, who had witnessed madness in its most terrifying forms over the centuries, felt a chill at the destructive potential of Ikki. He knew that the mind of someone so powerful, when pushed to the extreme, could collapse catastrophically. And with a demigod of Ikki's magnitude, this meant disaster not just for him but for everyone around him. The madness of an ordinary man was already frightening; the madness of a son of Zeus, amplified by divine power, was something no one wanted to witness.

That was why Dionysus, usually so carefree and provocative, chose his words more carefully around Ikki. He knew a poorly placed provocation could be the trigger that unleashed the latent chaos within the boy. He wasn't just afraid of a physical confrontation—he feared what Ikki might do if pushed beyond his mental and emotional limits. Madness was a force he deeply respected, and he recognized its signs in the young demigod.

Ikki was on a thin line, and any misstep could push him into the abyss.

Thus, he decided it was wiser to maintain an emotional distance from Ikki. He was still the irreverent god, but with Ikki, he held his tongue, preferring not to stoke the flames already burning dangerously close to the surface. He knew it was best for everyone to let Ikki find his way back to stability without unnecessary pressure. The God of Wine could be cruel and sarcastic, but he wasn't foolish. He understood that some battles weren't worth fighting, especially when the camp's stability—and even Olympus—could be at stake.

He wasn't just the god who disregarded heroes out of contempt; he was also the god who knew when to retreat, when to observe from afar. He understood the power of madness and feared what could happen if Ikki succumbed to it. That's why he chose a more cautious approach, offering space to the boy and refraining from provoking him upon his return...

Chiron cast a warning glance at Mr. D before turning back to Ikki. "If you want to talk, I'm here to listen."

Ikki took a deep breath, holding back the emotions that raged every time this subject came up, his hands gripping the fabric of his pants. "Luke. He... he killed my mother."

Chiron's expression changed instantly. His eyes widened, and for a moment, he was silent, absorbing the gravity of what Ikki had just said.

"Luke... killed your mother?" His voice trembled slightly, laden with shock and sadness. "Ikki, I'm so sorry. What happened to lead to this...?"

Ikki took a deep breath and began to slowly explain what had happened, trying his best to maintain a calm and strong demeanor.

When he finished, Chiron looked somewhat somber. He seemed to have aged a few years. Luke had been one of the campers he had trained and been most proud of, but he had turned against the gods and joined Kronos. As if that weren't enough, he had taken the life of an innocent mortal just to hurt Ikki, leaving Chiron with a certain sense of guilt. Although he knew it wasn't his fault, he blamed himself for not guiding Luke to the right path...

Dionysus, usually indifferent, seemed uncomfortable. He glanced briefly at Ikki but quickly shifted his gaze back to his cards. "It's... it's a shame. A real tragedy." His voice was softer than usual, devoid of his typical sarcasm. He played another card, but it seemed like he did so mechanically, without his usual enthusiasm.

Chiron was surprised by Mr. D's behavior, and a little proud of it. Could it be that his words about going easy on the kids were finally sinking into the God of Madness's mind? He was snapped out of his thoughts by the son of Zeus.

"I needed this time to process, which is why I disappeared without a word. Sorry for that," Ikki said with a sigh as he explained.

Chiron placed a hand on the boy's shoulder, as if trying to convey comfort through the touch. "You did what you had to do. But please, remember that you're not alone. We're all here to support you, Ikki. I'm here for you."

Dionysus clicked his tongue but in a more subdued manner. "Yes, yes, support and all that." He glanced sideways at Ikki, his tone cautious. "I think we all want you to... be okay."

Ikki looked surprised at Mr. D. Ever since he had entered the room, the god of wine, usually sarcastic and provocative, had been unusually quiet, almost restrained. He had expected the wrong nicknames, the disdainful comments, but instead, Dionysus was choosing his words carefully, avoiding any direct provocation.

He frowned, trying to understand the reason behind this change. Dionysus was not known for his tact, so why now, all of a sudden, was he being so cautious? The memory of the meeting on Olympus surged into his mind like a wave. The moment he had threatened the gods with his power, leaving them afraid...

Ikki realized that Dionysus's behavior change wasn't out of courtesy. It was fear. Fear of what he might do if pushed to his limit again.

He glanced at Dionysus, who now pretended to be completely absorbed in the card game. There was a subtle tension in his posture, something the god didn't usually display. Ikki felt a mix of emotions.

After talking a bit more with Chiron, explaining some things and asking for updates on what had happened over the year, Ikki decided to wrap things up for the time being. He bid farewell to the two immortals and left the Big House.