Rebirth of Showbiz: Return of the Movie Queen

For Lin Qingwan, the days after her homecoming were like turning points. Back with life in overload, entertainment after entertainment rehearsing and deadlines from a set bustle with action all around. What had once felt too heavy now felt easier. The constant pressure, the awareness of the world surrounding her——they do not bear as much weight over her anymore.

The clarity she did get, was really only the precursor to bigger storm. Lin Qingwan could make a choice between her platform, and personal life and life that was woven into this frail thing called half-life. She had gotten used to being told that yes should be okay, but the external forces continued to trade scepticism. Her next decisions would decide if she allowed the industry to determine her, or if she broke free and learnt how determine her own future.

Lin Qingwan took her first steps onto the set of her new film in the cool air of a morning. It was still dark on the horizon yet the sun nigh sunrise making golden leave over everything. In another film, her character Li Na would have an emotional showdown with someone she used to trust (now her biggest enemy) but the words she spoke came from the depths of her own soul and Lin had no idea how hard it would be. But today, something seemed off.

She had been reflecting over the last few days, on her life, on her decisions and about the people she had let control the path most. At the moment, several questions remained wide open and she had no answers to them, but Above all less afraid of the Arc. She realized that aiming for perfection is never your true objective; be at peace, like yourself and the ability to choose freely in life were what mattered most.

After the press conference, Yang Xue said back to her work with Zhao Ming in his office later that same day. The discuss was what would happen next in the new stuff they were going to reveal at the press conference. She had worked with Zhao Ming for years, and though this, she never really questioned his need to know about me but on a personal level.

But this is now, after everything I have been through and it is time.

I have thought a lot lately about my career, what do I want and where do i want to go

He turned his head at her, hard eyes of curiosity and compassion. "What do you mean?"

I want to take control of the story of my own I don't want to be just another pawn in this industry I cannot keep living the way we have been writing it for us

I want to make my own way as a person rather than merely following the automatically followed scripts of sorts others had written for me.ฝรั่งเศส

 Zhao Ming paused and put his head nearer looking thoughtfully in front.

"I know Qingwan," he said very quietly "But you should also already know that this industry is not much of an easy industry. Breaking away from it – really breaking away, comes at a cost. You opening up for that?

Lin Qingwan paused while taking a deep breath. I don't know what the future holds Zhao Ming But I do know I can't keep self-sacrificing for recognition and fame. I think I will be forever grateful for all the years wasted chasing what I imagined wanted but now now i just want to be me

Zhao Ming nodded uncertainly, eyes pouting. "Whatever you choose, I back you 100% You deserve it You just have to tell me- no matter what the industry pressures, promise me that you wont lose what matters most!

There was a moment as she walked out of her dressing room and into the car, and understanding washed over her. I had no idea what form that struggle would take in the months, years ahead but this time ~ at least for now ~ I felt like I had a purpose that went above and beyond just being famous, successful. For the first time, the industry, the press, everyone who had always defined her worldly performance- these were no longer her priority. And now she had herself.

The press conference was arriving quickly, and Lin Qingwan stood before the mirror tweeking her dress. I picked something so simple and down to earth — nothing super. I guess this was my moment, not only to regain control of my career but also of my life. Ready to face the world and ready to step into the light because now I am undeniably me.

She felt a loosening… as she walked out of her dressing room and into the cab. It relieved me— the weight from the past couple weeks, all that doubt, all those inner wars, all the conflict—started to drop. I was just going to announce the sequel of her next project—she was announcing her new life. That one, I had it together and finally did not have to play to a crowd.

And as the car drove down the streets of the city it smiled… and it is but the start.

The days afterwards the press conference were an emotional cocktail Linqingwan had declared that she was tired of being on the receiving end and eager to take charge of her own life, both professionally and personally. As much as she felt emancipated, the world surrounding her had slowed but not stopped. The press continued to pester and question every move she made and they carried around this unspoken challenge like a mystifying object of pilot gear.

But still, all chaos aside was a respite in her wounds. Lin Qingwan realised that no matter what the world expected, she had to be true to herself in order for her to succeed. And it was a hard lesson, but one that she was open to accepting. Now not only her work but her peace, the rediscovery of what really mattered.

One night when she was alone in the flat watching the details of a role for an upcoming film there was the knock on the door. To my surprise actually and for all of that second hesitated. It was well into the night and there was no need for more coffee conversations. Yet when she opened the door there was the face she had that as soon she opened it

Gu Yan.

His was just such an all-encompassing presence. She'd always had him, since the beginning. But lately, something switched between them. I could feel the barely contained slight in our dynamic over since our last conversation. He had always backed her, but the difference now was that he wanted more. And I did too.

"Gu Yan," Lin Qingwan remarked, her voice tinged with surprise. "What are you doing here?"

"I … I just needed to see how you were doing," he said softly entering. I figured you might need someone to talk to 'cause you've been through a lot recently and he/she should do. And someone who gets it. Closing the door behind him he motioned him sit. She hadn't expected this but warmth in his tone made her feel how much she really cared for a presence. Somehow, he had always been more than just her manager. He had been the one to bear weight for me.

I am, "she added, nothing more than hollow words and those falling short. I just adjusting, you know the drill workig it out.

Gu Yan sat across from her and she watched as he searched her eyes. "Qingwan, I know you have been through a lot. And I mean you would never lean on anybody.

"I'm good," she said, her voice like cotton candy but not necessarily convincing. "I just barely acclimate, trying to catch up on everything.

Gu Yan pushed away from me after a long pause. His eyes never wavered as he waited for her to continue. The only thing between them was a thick cloud of unvoiced feelings.

He choked out finally, his voice deep but genuine. "No, I am not asking you for anything, Qingwaa. You will just listen and know that I care. I mean that I am not wanting the fame or wealth I am here for you. I am here because you know that even though Id rather not.

Lin Qingwan was physically reacting with the blunt pain of his words. She always knew that Gu Yan took cared of her but hearing him basically admit it publicly was what helped her new found guilt. She knew there was something special between them, long since the professional boundaries they believed would stop others. But she was scared.

"I can not hurt you," she whispered and her voice was so fragile. "I do not know if I am ready for this.

She pushed away from her desk and walked over to him, putting a hand on his shoulder. "You don't need to rush, Qingwan. I am not asking for anything from you now. I just want you to know that I am here no matter what.

Over the following days, it was contemplation or hammered press statements. From thereon, Lin Qingwan struggled to concentrate on her work at all the roles she was offered because every time she thought about Gu Yan it felt like her heart was pounding. She wasn't good with relationships whatsoever especially when it blurs the lines of professional and personal. But the way Gu Yan still stood there unconditionally for her, it made her understand that maybe this time she wasn't as scared as she thought.

Now that evening she found herself in front of the door to her apartment twirling around three inches in size. I was thinking about Gu Yan in all the things he said and that my feelings for him kept changing. I was not, but at some point I need to stop running from what it is.

But when she opened the door, he was there waiting for her on the other side with his demeanor placid but holding something profoundly.

"I have been thinking," Lin Qingwan said, her soft voice as firm. "All of us, everything. And I believe… I think… that I am ready now.

Gu Yan leaned in closer, his hand gliding over hers. "You are not needed to race, Qingwaa but I am." They stood stationary between one another, a palpable comprehension hanging over their heads. Lin Qingwan had no idea what would be, but since times she felt that was the only acquaintance for which she would be willing to try something new.

Epilogue 33

Narrative

Lin Qingwan took the first real step towards regaining control of her life in this chapter. Not playing it safe and staying within the confines of that which was expected, she chose to pursue something less safe but authentic to her. When she talked to Yang Xue, she realised that the road she was always walking was no longer meaningful. Lin Qingwaa took a breather to think things through and