the beginning after the end by Turtleme

REYNOLD LEYWIN'S POV:

I couldn't believe it.

My son. My son was gone.

"NOOOO!" "NO, NO, NO, NO, NO, NO."

Durden had to hold me back before I jumped off the cliff myself to save my son.

I knew it was too late. I knew what could've happened had already happened but I couldn't just stand still, not doing anything.

"Let me go! My son! He could still be alive. Let me save my son! Please."

Durden wasn't budging and Adam came to help hold me back too.

"Please Rey. You have to hold it together. There's no easy way to tell you this but it wasn't possible for him to have survived that fall." The always playful and lax Adam had a solemn expression on his face and couldn't even meet my eyes.

"Adam is right. Pull yourself together. Your wife needs you, Rey," Durden also muttered.

They're right. They're absolutely right. Yet. Why is my body not listening to me? Why can't I go comfort my wife.

"AAAAHHHHHHH!!!" I broke down before everything went black.

Waking up, I noticed Helen holding a wet towel over my head.

"You're finally awake," She said, a sympathetic smile on her face that lacked confidence.

I ignored her and sat up, burying my face into my hands.

"This isn't a dream is it? Please tell me I'm going to wake up to see my boy playing with Jasmine and Adam."

"..."

"I'm sorry..." were the only words she managed to say before she started sniffling as well.

The flap of the tent opens as Durden made his way inside.

"Reynolds. I can't begin to imagine how much it must hurt for you, but right now, your wife needs you. She's blaming herself, Rey. She thinks you hate her for losing your child," he said, his red eyes evident that he was having a hard time as well.

"..." Unable to muster up any words in response, I turned away from Durden.

All of a sudden a felt a sharp jerk as I was pulled back. Just as my eyes caught a glimpse of Durden's large hand, my vision blurs and a stinging pain was throbbing on my cheek where he had smacked me.

"Reynolds! We had to stop Alice from killing herself! This isn't the time to be moping! Get off your sorry ass and take care of the one that's actually alive!" he growled.

This was the first time I had seen the usually composed Durden this infuriated.

I managed a stiff nod, my brain still throbbing from the hit, as made my way to my wife's tent.

I spotted my wife curled up under a blanket with Angela by her side, patting her gently.

I gave a meaningful look to Angela. Understanding what I wanted, she simply nodded before excusing herself out of the tent.

"...Alice"

"..."

"Honey. Can I see my wife's beautiful face?"

"...child" I faintly heard her mumble.

"What was that honey?" I responded, patting her back.

"I killed our child!" She bolted up and turned to face me.

"I killed our son, Reynolds. It was my fault! I-if I wasn't there, he could've dodged that. He could've lived. He sacrificed himself to save me *sniff* it was my fault."

I pulled my wife toward me and held her tight, softly kissing the top of her head over and over.

I kept my eyes shut tightly, keeping myself from crying as she continued sobbing into my chest.

We just sat like this for a while until her sobs turned into dry whimpers.

*Hic*

"You don't hate me?" I was barely able to hear her whisper.

"How could I ever hate you? Alice. I love you and I always will."

*Hic* *Hic*

"...I miss him so much, Rey." She began sobbing againt.

I clench my jaws, willing myself to stay strong in front of my wife.

"I-I know honey. I miss him too."

The rest of the journey was a slow and arduous one. Not physically. No. 1 I felt like even the wild animals knew of our emotional torment as they steered clear away from us. Our group advanced in quiet. Any of Adam's attempts at trying to lighten up the mood met with a crushing silence. Even the cheerful Angela bore a solemn face throughout the rest of the journey.

Alice and I fell asleep together last night together in each other's arms. I managed to console her and it helped me as well. I needed an excuse. I was the one that had sent Arthur to protect Alice. I kept trying to find people to blame but the ones that were actually at fault were already killed. Revenge had already been taken. Now, all I was left with was this dark hole of emptiness and regret. The only thing that was keeping Alice and me sane was our unborn child. For that child, my child, I had to endure. I wasn't going to make the same mistake I had made with Arthur. He was only a child but I sent him off to protect my wife against fighters and even a mage. I had no one to blame but myself.

We arrived at the floating city of Xyrus through the teleportation gate with no further complications; as though God was mocking us by saying we've been through enough. The Twin Horns were supposed to separate from my wife and I from here.

"You guys sure you'll be okay?" Adam gave us a rare concerned look.

Durden added, "We don't mind staying with you guys for a couple more days. I know you originally came to this city for Arthur but..." He never finished the sentence.

"It's okay. You guys have your agenda. Alice and I have all of our basic necessities and money to live off of for a couple of weeks. Keep your guys' positions updated in Guild Hall." I waved them off, trying to force a smile.

"Will do. Take care guys. We'll see each other soon." Durden replied, hugging the both of us.

The girls also gave Alice a warm hug after saying their goodbyes to her. After they had left, I turned to my wife, giving her a serious look.

"Alice, what do you say about living here from now on?"

Giving me a confused look, she replied, "What about our home in Ashber? We just got it all fixed up. A lot of our stuff is still there."

I shook my head at this. "I think it'll be better for us to have a fresh new surrounding. Our home in Ashber has too many memories of Art. I don't think we'll be able to get over it if we stay there. We'll hire some merchants to deliver some of our stuff from Ashber here to us."

She looked down as she decided before giving me a small nod. "What about a job? How will we afford to live here? This is a very expensive city to live in, Rey," she added, a worried look on her face.

For once, I was able to muster up a real smile, a sincere smile that seemed so rare these days. "I know an old friend that lives here. He's asked me to be his guard numerous times years back and we still keep in touch from time to time. He's a fairly renown merchant in this area and has a large manor. I'm sure he'll have a place for us to stay. They're good people, Alice."