Chapter 87
“I’m sorry. I know it sounds really absurd even to me. But I mean it.”
I understood. The sound of his heartbeat, and the steadiness of his voice conveyed his sincerity. Looking into his eyes, there was no trace of deception.
“So, let me make this clear. Once everything is over, I’ll only be looking at you. Just hang on until then… Can you do that?”
I’m not entirely sure what I’m supposed to endure. Obsession? Or this dark, boiling emotion? Is it just a request for a little bit of freedom?
I don’t like it… but since he promised it himself, I’ll let it slide this once. If I can’t even endure that, then we’re not friends.
“…You really mean it, huh.”
Listening to Dokan silently, I could tell he was genuinely saying what he meant.
It wasn’t because I disliked or felt inadequate; it was just this inexplicable sense of compatibility. Of course, there was a tinge of selfishness involved, but still.
Annoying as it was, there were people so charming that even I could overlook that.
“Alright. I can endure that much. You’re my best friend, after all. But…”
I slowly turned towards Dokan.
– “Can you trust me?”
I will trust him. As long as he doesn’t betray me first.
But if, by any chance, I see him getting too close to another girl…
Yeah. I wouldn’t know what I might do.
“What exactly is going to end? After everything, you really plan to cut ties with everyone else cleanly, right?”
Then I grabbed his shoulder tightly, making it known to everyone that he was mine.
Dokan let out a painful groan, but it would be fine. The dark mist would take care of that. So now, I needed to teach Dokan clearly.
In the end, you belong to me. Just like a boomerang, you’ll eventually come back to me. Because you like me.
This warmth, that expression, this scent. All of it will ultimately belong to me.
“Ho-yeon…! I think I might break. Let go…!”
Yeah. This face is for my eyes only. A twisted expression distorted by pain. I can’t let other girls see this. This good stuff is only for me.
“If you don’t cut ties neatly and do something weird, I’ll get mad, you know?”
I said brightly, smiling widely at Dokan.
“Ah, okay. So please, just…!”
Oh, right. I’m still holding on. If he breaks, it’s really okay; he just feigns intolerance when it gets to moments like this.
By the way, even if he’s strengthened, humans are still weak. I contemplated whether I should nibble on his neck, feeling our breaths intertwine.
…Huh, wait. What am I doing right now?
“Ah, I’m sorry…!”
What am I doing to my precious friend…? Moreover, I swore I’d leave him alone today, so why did I touch him?
Is it because of the heat? But this has never happened before. I was confused as to why such changes were occurring.
As I watched Dokan shift around, checking if anything was wrong, I pondered how to apologize for what I had just done, but nothing came to mind.
I wasn’t in my right mind, but still… I almost crushed my only friend’s shoulder…!
“Are-are you okay?!”
Vaguely, I knew I held on tightly enough to make it feel like ‘it might break.’ Although I’m not particularly strong, I could still crush a regular human, which worried me.
“…Um. It seems like there’s no breakage… at least, I think.”
Dokan kept his distance from me, likely due to what just happened. Ah, I should have held back. Why couldn’t I endure just that moment…
It felt like the atmosphere could have flowed positively, but my actions ruined it. Dokan didn’t seem to want to say anything either.
I had nothing to say. I already said I’d trust him, and he seemed done expressing himself.
“…Just in case, you might want to visit the nurse’s office… Human bodies are weak, you know…”
Yeah. We can’t easily get better just by lounging around after eating some meat. I should make sure there’s no subtle damage that might show.
“Um… okay. Then I’ll go…”
I watched Dokan awkwardly leave without being able to stop him. Even knowing he would soon start meeting other girls.
…Ugh. Why am I in this state…
The good mood I had while breathing fresh air sank straight into despair. I had no desire to meditate alone, so I followed after Dokan.
Actually, I had another favor to ask Black Wolf anyway. I should head back to my room.
—–
Thinking it would be futile to keep deceiving her, I confronted Ho-yeon with my true feelings, but…
What came back was a completely unexpected reaction. I thought there would be some talk, but…
The grip she had was tightly strong enough to potentially break shoulders. And her expression too.
Her eyes were wide, revealing her fangs. It was a look that expressed she wanted to sever all ties with every heroine but would let it slide until the ending due to my request.
…It was terrifying. It felt different from just intimidation. It was as if she was looking at something she owned, an expression that made it hard to believe she was gazing at the same human.
Still… at least I got her permission. There shouldn’t be a need to tread lightly around her anymore… right?
Holding on to a faint hope, I headed calmly to the nurse’s office. It might be a crack at worst, or at least a bruise.
“Hey, it’s Dokan! Good to see you! But why are you here?”
“You are…”
And then I encountered unexpected people.
“Exipri. And… Lady Camilla. I didn’t expect to see you here. I’ve come because my shoulders have been sore since yesterday, hoping to get some medicine. I guess I understand why you’re here, Exi. Did you fall down?”
Her clothes were covered in dirt, and her knees were scraped and bleeding, but judging by Camilla’s calm demeanor, she probably didn’t get hurt too badly. She must have rolled around somewhere quite a bit.
“How did you know?!”
Well, that’s basic.
I wanted to say that but couldn’t due to Camilla’s glaring gaze. I just remained silent, thinking that there are some obvious indicators.
Exipri scurried into the nurse’s office first, leaving just her and me.
Originally acting like she couldn’t meet me because of some circumstances, I could tell Camilla was at least trying to avoid me.
“…Can I ask why you’re avoiding me?”
I didn’t particularly like her, and she probably felt that way too, but since she’s a heroine, I thought I should try to clear up any misunderstandings.
“Can I ask why you keep chasing me when you claim to dislike me?”
But perhaps she had firmly decided she disliked me, as instead of explaining, she just shot back with a demand for me to leave her alone.
I couldn’t do that. After going through all that trouble, it felt terrible to give up.
“…Well. I wanted to have a bit of a chat.”
“I have no interest in chatting with you. And if you want to talk, how about with that princess who’s holding your leash?”
Saying that left me speechless. Thinking about it, my close friendship with Ho-yeon had already spread throughout town, making it difficult to target other heroines.
Even if we’re not officially dating, Anya would definitely be angry, saying, “Are you dating Ho-yeon and now you’re cheating?!”
…In the end, it was all just events. All that’s left is the final exam and the school trip. I was bothered by whether I could manage something within those two.
Would she even agree in the first place? My confidence was steadily dwindling.
“Hmph. So you’ve implanted yourself everywhere, thinking looks alone can get you by. You’re going to get hurt badly. Let this be your last kindness.”
With Camilla’s harsh words added to the mix, a happy ending really did seem far off.
Stephanie, who could have been a legitimate reason to seek her help, was practically dead. It felt as though my events with Camilla had come to an end.
…Has it really come to this already?
“…Thanks for the advice.”
After that, Camilla showed no more reactions towards me. With bandages on her knees and some ointment on her face, her bright smile felt strangely different.
Maybe it was her exhaustion that I was now witnessing.
Is clinging to Ho-yeon really the right answer? Was my belief that I could lead this world to a happy ending just arrogance?
But I’m still caught in a scenario where it’s not over yet, unable to do anything either way.
…Ugh.
“Dokan, was it? Tread wisely. Although it pales in comparison to Ho-yeon, there’s quite a bit of talk about you too. This is my apology for ignoring your call, so don’t get any delusions.”
Watching Camilla leave, I felt that maybe her essence wasn’t completely rotten.
Had I experienced the events honestly, I might have qualified as a heroine. It seemed to have gotten tangled due to Ho-yeon’s presence.
A lot of thoughts swirled through my mind.
Is it really impossible to see a happy ending?
I wanted to brush it off as a hasty conclusion, but now I truly couldn’t do that.
While accepting the medicine, I couldn’t sketch out a hopeful future at all.
Now… I truly have no idea what to do.