Thick of it : reboot

Ah, another glorious day in the life of yours truly! My morning began like any other—reaching for my phone to check the time, only to discover I was *spectacularly* late for work. Fantastic. If I didn't hustle, my boss would be breathing down my neck like a dragon with a caffeine addiction. But let's be real, who actually *wants* to go to work? Not me, that's for sure. Still, in this cursed world of capitalism, no money means no food, so off I went, dragging my soul-crushed self out of bed and into the daily grind.

After a quick pit stop to make myself look somewhat presentable (read: throwing on whatever was least wrinkled), I headed out the door. To pass the time on my commute, I scrolled through Instagram, diving into the endless abyss of reels and drama. Same old, same old—pop culture feuds, influencers beefing over who knows what, and the occasional meme that made me exhale slightly harder than usual. Today's hot topic? XQC and Kai Cenat going at it. What were they even fighting about? No clue. Probably something ridiculous. But hey, it's the kind of nonsense that keeps the internet entertained for a solid 48 hours.

Just as I was about to dive into another reel, my bus arrived. I queued up, earbuds in, zoning out like a pro. And then—*bam!*—life decided to throw me a curveball. A massive truck came barreling down the road like it was auditioning for *Fast & Furious 27*. Skidding, screeching, and then—*impact*. 

One second, I was standing there, minding my own business. The next, I was airborne, flailing like a ragdoll in a tornado. My body hit the asphalt with a sickening thud, and pain—oh, the pain!—exploded through every nerve like a firework show gone wrong. Blood? Everywhere. It was like someone had turned me into a human sprinkler. Not my finest moment, I'll admit.

And then, as if on cue, the infamous life flashback kicked in. You know, the one they say happens when you're teetering on the edge of existence? Turns out, it's legit. My life wasn't bad, per se—just... average. No grand adventures, no epic tales to tell. Just your run-of-the-mill, work-to-survive kind of existence. But hey, it was mine, and I was kinda attached to it. 

Now? None of that mattered. 

I found myself standing in this surreal, endless expanse of white. The ground beneath my feet felt like walking on clouds, and the sky above was a perfect, serene blue. It was peaceful, like I'd stumbled into the ultimate chill zone for souls. I was about to take a step forward, ready to embrace eternal rest, when—*plot twist!*—everything turned an ominous shade of purple. 

I froze. That's when I felt it—a presence behind me. Slowly, I turned, and there he was. Gojo Satoru. White hair, piercing blue eyes, and an aura that screamed, "I'm way too powerful for your nonsense." 

Panic set in immediately. "No! No!! NO!!! Don't do it, you motherf—!" I screamed, bolting in the opposite direction like my life depended on it (which, spoiler alert, it did).

"Oi, Jason!" his voice echoed, dripping with that signature smugness. "What's the problem? Weren't you the one calling me Kit Kat in the comments section, huh? Why run now, huh, *bitch*?"

"It was funny, man!" I shouted back, not daring to stop. 

Gojo's response was as inevitable as it was terrifying: "Here's your reward then. *Hollow Purple*."

In an instant, the world turned purple again, and a surge of energy blasted through the air. I braced myself, but let's be real—there's no bracing for *that*.

Then everything turn white for me .

After some time i start to stand up , trying to get my bearing .

Before I could even process what was happening, Gojo was right in front of me, grabbing me by the collar like I was a misbehaving kitten.

"Now, what happened to that big, blabbering mouth of yours, huh?" he teased, his grin anything but friendly.

"It was just the IG comments, man!" I stammered, my voice shaking. "I thought it made me sound cool!"

Gojo cocked his head, his grin widening. "Defending yourself now? You little shits have been running your mouths without consequence for far too long. Time to take responsibility. And I've got just the way to do it."

"What... what are you talking about?" I asked, dread pooling in my stomach.

"Oh, it's simple," he said, laughing maniacally. "I'm gonna isekai your ass. Marvel? DXD? Harry Potter? Pick your poison—either way, you're getting killed or experimented on. Hahahaha!"

"NO! Those worlds are way too hardcore!" I begged. "Wait—did you become a god or something?"

Gojo smirked. "Of course. If not me, then who else? Honestly, I'd send you to some goblin-infested world as a helpless female villager, but I'm saving that for the truly deranged ones."

"Thank God," I muttered under my breath. "But please, at least give me a cheat or something! I need to survive!"

Gojo's grin turned downright devilish. "A cheat? Nah."

"Please!" I cried, desperation spilling over. "I also called Sukuna a fraud! Please, sir, don't be like this—I'll do anything!"

Gojo paused, tapping his chin mockingly. "Well, since you called Sukuna a fraud... I'll be generous. I'll give you magic."

Relief flooded through me. "Yes! Thank you! "

Gojo simply laughed and tossed me into a swirling portal. "Good luck, Jason. You're gonna need it."

And with that, I was gone. Off to who-knows-where, armed with nothing but a gacha system and a whole lot of regret. Thanks, Gojo. Thanks a lot.