Cheat day

Little People (3)

“Everyone, you know, right? This guy usually just blurts out whatever! Don’t misunderstand!”

└ Hahaha!
└ Oh, it’s spicy!
└ He’s really lost it, hasn’t he?
└ A million-subscriber YouTuber revealing his political stance.
└ Why can’t you answer?

I shook off the weak Baek Woo-jin’s hand and pressed him further.

“Why are you so flustered?”

“If you were me, wouldn’t you be?!”

“Come to think of it, you’re sitting on my right…”

└ Oh my!
└ This is a clear giveaway.
└ I need to go edit the Namuwiki.
└ Hahaha, it seems like Baek Woo-jin is really flustered; usually, he’s the talkative one, but now he’s stumbling over his words.

Baek Woo-jin was trying to cover my mouth, but it was no use.

“So why can’t you answer? You’re getting up and sitting down, looking restless. Huh?”

“What else?!”

“Why aren’t you looking restless in the other direction? You’ve only been looking restless this way. Are you revealing your political stance now?”

Baek Woo-jin’s eyes nearly popped out.

“Hey!”

└ Hahaha!
└ That’s a wild one!
└ Has Baek Woo-jin lost it? Hahaha!
└ Is it too late for him to go back now? Hahaha!

A spontaneous joke slipped out without passing through my mental filter. Now that it had come to this, I had to fully embrace being a crazy person to stay safe from those trying to divide us.

“You haven’t been answering, just yelling, so clarify your stance! Is it left or right?”

Baek Woo-jin just moved his mouth without saying anything.

“By the way, Woo-jin, doesn’t ‘march to the right’ mean something? Then it’s right-wing!”

Baek Woo-jin grabbed the back of my head and started shaking it.

“Ah! Let go! Are you not going to let go?”

“Let’s both die! Do you think only you will die?”

“Ahhhhh!”

After a while,

When we finally calmed down and sat down, the scene captured on the camera was chaotic.

Baek Woo-jin was sprawled on the studio floor, breathing heavily.

Even though I was stronger, Baek Woo-jin kept putting me in strange holds he learned from jiu-jitsu, making it hard for me to breathe.

└ Surprisingly, Baek Woo-jin is holding up well.
└ Haha!
└ This is so funny!
└ What are we doing at 34 and 32 years old, fighting like kids on a broadcast? Hahaha!
└ They must be pretending; there’s no way it was real, right? Hahaha!
└ They were just hugging it out without throwing any punches.
└ I’ve seen fights like this on the news during debates.
└ This is legit historical accuracy, hahaha!
└ Wow, Baek Ban is a genius. He’s raising the tension in the discussion again.
└ The change-up was insane.
└ You’re packaging it like this?

“…….”

I felt embarrassed.

I approached Baek Woo-jin and offered my hand.

When he grabbed my hand to get up, I brushed off his back and butt, and the atmosphere shifted as if everyone was enjoying a staged scene.

What luck.

“Just strong. Just strong.”

“Then why do you keep charging at me?”

“To shut that mouth of yours.”

“Ugh, this is exhausting. Everyone, I’m ending today’s broadcast here.”

└ From next week, just wear gloves instead of debating!
└ Hahaha!
└ Why are these guys like this? Hahaha!
└ It’s really tough making a living.
└ Seeing you two sweating makes me relieved. I hope you continue to exercise together and lose weight.
└ That’s great for blood sugar control!

After finishing the broadcast, I came back to my senses.

“Seriously, don’t cross the line.”

Baek Woo-jin said with a huff.

“You better not cross the line either.”

“How funny. What did I do?”

“Haim.”

“What?”

“Are you scared of touching politicians but not scared of touching celebrities?”

Baek Woo-jin sat up.

“Blindly following politicians is scary, but you also have to be cautious of celebrity fandoms. Do you know how many Haim fans there are?”

“…….”

“If she’s not particularly close to you, it wouldn’t feel good to be mentioned like this, right? It could be even worse for her fans.”

“……I get it.”

Now it was Baek Woo-jin’s turn.

At some point, Baek Ban Talk started heating up little by little.

Today, too, I had made a reckless move because I wanted to make things even a bit funnier.

After realizing that, we took turns pointing out each other’s words and actions after the broadcast.

“You should be careful too. Why did ‘Das’ come up? It was a long-past topic, so it’s lucky it wasn’t too serious; what would have happened if the mood had gotten tense?”

He listened silently.

I always prioritize listening, even if I have a different opinion and something to refute.

“I know. Baek Ban Talk is usually like this, so viewers accept it to some extent. But are we going to end it here?”

It was fortunate that Baek Ban Talk was understood as a variety show filled with nonsense and jokes from the very first episode.

I took on the role of attacking with incitement and fabrication, while Baek Woo-jin firmly accepted his unjust situation, allowing us to laugh off most absurdities.

However, this was only true for our regular viewers.

Baek Woo-jin pointed this out.

“Someone will definitely clip this and post it as shorts. What do you think strangers will think when they see it?”

“Right.”

After our time of reflection and critique, we look for ways to compliment each other.

Knowing how tough this job is, I started thinking that if we only reflected, Baek Ban Talk wouldn’t be enjoyable, so we should at least praise each other.

“I was surprised when you responded to the sales difference in the brotherly manner. I had no way to refute that.”

“Of course.”

“Did you think of that in advance?”

“How many times have I faced you? I know how you’ll come at me.”

“Really?”

As I smiled, Baek Woo-jin made a sulky face.

“……That was a bit refreshing.”

Sometimes, I too get surprised.

For example, connecting mint chocolate to 민초 (Mincho) or linking octopus to 문어지다 (to crumble), or the phrases ‘Did you get candy?’ and ‘Did you become a flatfish?’—I often wonder how I come up with these jokes.

Of course, some of them are ones I hesitate to use, but today, they slipped out before I could self-censor.

“Woo-jin.”

Baek Woo-jin turned his head.

“I think we’ve really grown a lot.”

“What do you mean?”

“We used to not care about this kind of stuff. Now we’re cautious because our subscriber count has increased. We’re careful because we’ve got responsibilities.”

“Isn’t that just how it is?”

“Right. But if we keep being like this, will we still have competitiveness?”

“What do you mean?”

“Think about it. We’ve grown up in our raw form, but now we’re being careful with our words. We’re holding back what we want to say. If that continues, what’s the difference between us and traditional media? No, it’s a minor version of that.”

The reason I can appear on various broadcasts is that I have a YouTube channel and subscribers supporting me.

I once talked to Muk-ji about how the pantry must be intact for me to do any broadcasts, lectures, or advertisements.

But if I start showing a side of me that’s a little different from before, I worry about whether my subscribers will stick around.

“That’s funny. Is that being cautious?”

Baek Woo-jin’s interjection made me burst into laughter.

It seems like things are still okay.

***

Two people continue their conversation beyond the glass window.

“That’s funny. Is that being cautious?”

“So, what should we do next week?”

“I really have nothing left to do.”

“Didn’t we say that from the very first episode?”

I was worried about the content of today’s broadcast and tried to give feedback, but through their conversation, I realized it was an unnecessary worry.

As YouTubers with over a million subscribers each, they are aware of their influence.

Everyone makes mistakes, but I find comfort in how they both keep that in mind, remain vigilant, and accept others’ advice.

“How about pizza versus chicken?”

“……I really can’t think of anything.”

“We’ve been saying that since the first episode.”

Making someone laugh is a tremendous feat, and it’s that much harder.

Perhaps I viewed it from a shallow perspective, thinking that the two of them do this weekly for nearly a year simply because they have the talent for it.

To borrow Chan-yong’s expression, can it really be possible to think about this while constantly pulling your hair out?

Living with Chan-yong, I learned that even when he eats, showers, watches something, or even just sits around, he’s pondering jokes to use on the broadcast.

Suddenly, out of nowhere, he throws out nonsensical jokes and asks, “What do you think of this?”

If I laugh, he mentions it in the following week’s broadcast, the next day, or even on the same day.

It’s hard to gauge just how many thoughts occupy that mind of his.

It’s also difficult to imagine how much effort he’s put in to achieve that.

“So what do we do now?”

“Just do pizza versus chicken.”

“I really can’t think of anything.”

“When was there ever something to talk about?”

I opened the door and walked in.

“Eun-ji.”

“Eun-ji, please scold these two. If they keep broadcasting like this, the pantry will go under.”

Baek Woo-jin’s words made me laugh without even realizing it.

“You both deserve a scolding.”

Chan-yong’s eyes went wide.

He’s adorable.

“Because of today’s broadcast, it’ll be even harder to get advertisements. The reason why Baek Ban Talk hasn’t had ads for nearly a year is entirely your fault. If Crown Haitai sues us, we won’t have any defense.”

“I don’t care!”

Baek Woo-jin shouted.

“Baek Woo-jin, you’ll receive hate comments from Haim’s fans, so you don’t have to worry about any legal issues.”

Baek Woo-jin’s mouth fell open.

“Are you really going to sue?”

“Well, I don’t know. But it’s definitely fair if it happens.”

“……Should we do a voiceover or something before uploading this Baek Ban Talk?”

Chan-yong asked Baek Woo-jin.

“About what?”

“Tell them to eat a lot of Choco Haim and Kookdas. Say it’s delicious.”

“Isn’t that obviously just for liability protection? Will that even work?”

“Maybe they’d let it slide if we do that?”

“You do it alone. I don’t care.”

“I should probably ask Haim to roast you a bit.”

“Huh?”

“If Haim writes a post in the fan cafe, your life will be over.”

“When did I even see Haim? Just because we had pork cutlet together once, do you think I’d fall for that?”

“Eh? Will she? Will she contact you?”

“Let her.”

It really is unpredictable.

Just a moment ago, these two seemed reliable, but now they’re acting childish so quickly.