LIGHTNOVELWORLD chapter 63
63. Proposal Response 2
Her head was bowed deeply. Her deep green ponytail hung down, almost touching the table.
“I’m sorry that I wasn’t conscious that day and couldn’t give you a proper answer. But… I was really happy. My heart, which had stopped beating, started to move again. Thank you for choosing me and our future together.”
Under the doctor’s orders, I haven’t been able to deny my own words, but even if I hadn’t had those restrictions, could I have said it was a lie after seeing Uguisu-san like this? Uguisu-san’s simple words of gratitude were filled with her feelings for me, and I couldn’t see anything beyond the desire to “not make this person cry right now.” Even if the day comes when I have to tell her the truth, I don’t think I ‘ll be able to say it easily.
“Well, I thought Sora-san might not be interested in me, so to be honest, I was surprised by how sudden it was.”
My mind was blank, unable to think of anything to say, and I just opened and closed my mouth like an idiot. Even though I had imagined this scenario so many times, when I was actually confronted with her genuine love, I realized how heavy it would be to brush it aside.
My decision to save Uguisu-san that day was the right one, but it wasn’t a good decision to make lightly. Uguisu-san smiled happily as she watched me struggling for words, and then bowed slightly.
“I was surprised, but I was more relieved that it had finally happened… I will never let Sora-san regret this. I swear to become the ideal wife for you. I will become a woman that you will never want to let go of.”
I was overwhelmed by her humble posture, as if she was saying that she had been ‘chosen,’ and her words vowing her utmost devotion. Just one word of a lie could clear up the misunderstanding, and there might be a way to leave things ambiguous. But for an ordinary person like me, who has never experienced someone loving them so deeply, a hero’s love is too heavy to dismiss, reject, or even push away. It felt like a huge lead weight had been attached to my body, and the fact that it had turned into talk of marriage made me feel like I was being bound by mental chains.
“…Am I good enough for you?”
That’s why I end up escaping into such meaningless questions. It’s just because I’m an ordinary guy who can’t handle such an extraordinary amount of love. It’s impossible to accept. We’ve only known each other for a few months, and she’s proposed to me and is so happy about it. If possible, I’d like to be rejected or put on hold.
“Uguisu-san is a member of Philance Green, and even without that, you’re a beautiful and wonderful person. I’m a man with no outstanding talents, so it seems like a mismatch for me to be in a relationship with you … let alone get married. I’m afraid you’ll regret it.”
“Why are you suddenly being so pessimistic, Sora-san?”
Contrary to my feelings, Uguisu-san spoke in a gentle, coaxing tone, as if she were comforting a younger brother, and placed her hand over mine, which was clenched into a fist on the table. Uguisu-san’s palm was a strange mixture of smoothness and coolness that I had never felt before, and my hand, which she had gripped, naturally relaxed.
“Because, well, maybe a man who is more suited to Uguisu-san will appear in the future, and it’s a bit premature for me to be your marriage partner, or rather, I don’t want you to regret it… “
“That’s impossible.”
The strong denial was as clear as if I could hear the sharp sound effect of a sword cutting through the air.
“What saved me when I was on the brink of death was Sora-san’s love. A hero’s ability can’t lie. It was because I loved Sora-san with all my heart and wanted to respond to his feelings that the power of Philance Green lent me its strength. The power of love is usually something ambiguous that can’t be measured, but it’s different for us. The fact that I’m standing here now, healthy and whole, is proof that my love is genuine. How could the love that revived a single dying hero possibly shift to someone else or regret its fulfillment?”
As she said this, Nightingale stared at me with a serious expression, her eyes slightly narrowed in anger. Her face was a little tearful, as if she were remembering that time.
“I love Sora-san. It’s impossible for me to like anyone other than Sora-san. There is no one in this world who is more precious than you, who saved me with the power of love. And I know for sure that my love will never fade. I can already feel a surge of power from the joy of being able to meet Sora-san this morning. I’ve definitely become stronger since you me. My love has become even stronger because Sora-san clearly chose me.”
Hearing her strong feelings, I deeply regretted the fact that I had ever seen a glimmer of hope in Nightingale rejecting me on the spot. This person now feels an incomparably stronger sense of meaning in my existence than she ever did before. Every time I feel it more clearly, an unbearable feeling, akin to guilt, pierces my heart like a needle.
“I’m sorry, Nightingale-san. I got anxious wondering if I was good enough for you.”
Superficial, selfish, or conventional persuasion would only add fuel to the fire. Watching the woman in front of me become increasingly blind, I’m a sly man who’s relieved that I don’t have to reject her.
“No… I always thought I was the only one who was anxious, so I’m a little happy. Fufu, I’m sorry for being a bad wife.”
“W-wife?”
Her sudden, blunt words made me flinch.
“…D-did I do something wrong?”
Perhaps she was embarrassed by her own words, because Nightingale had pulled her hand away from my fist at some point.
“N-no, it’s just that it feels a little surreal.”
I can’t say no when she makes that face.
“Y-yes, that’s right. I’m sorry for getting carried away. I guess I’m a little too excited.”
Even though her tone was joking, Nightingale’s expression was a complex one, somehow anxious yet happy, yet lonely. Even on the surface, it didn’t seem like a happy ending to me.
I can’t help but wonder if it’s right to continue this false relationship with Nightingale, if we’re getting closer to the worst possible outcome I saw in that vision of the future.