Surviving as a Useless Bard in a Game

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The person who knew this city best was Fura.

Although the information was a bit outdated.

“When was this map made…?”

“It can’t be helped.”

Fura interrupted briefly and pointed with her finger at the west side of the map. It had ‘West Gate’ written in small letters.

Skylar and I quietly waited for Fura to speak, and she promptly began explaining.

No matter how old it gets, a city with tradition doesn’t change its traditions.

Especially if the city leader has been absent for over 150 years.

There had been a lord of the city, but the true leader was undeniably Fura. She was the administrator of the Central Church, so it’s only natural.

In other words, the city hadn’t changed much.

“The West Gate has the least guard. There aren’t any elite guards either. If there’s a place where no one will recognize us, it’s definitely the West Gate.”

Skylar and I nodded in agreement.

“The main gate is the passage frequented by nobles and merchants. Generally, it has the tightest security.”

“… Is there any possibility that the knights expected us to escape through the West Gate?”

“Nope. The church people don’t have time to manage the entire city they believe in.”

“I see.”

Skylar closed his mouth, looking convinced. Fura continued her explanation.

“We need to move individually. Even if we dress like beggars, being together will make us too conspicuous.”

“Is that so?”

“Yeah. Beggars have their own strict territories. They don’t trespass into each other’s areas and beg alone. But if there are three beggars roaming together? The knights would definitely take notice.”

Convinced by Fura’s words, we started to plot our paths.

Same starting point.

Same destination.

Different routes.

Slowly, we left the inn at staggered intervals and glanced at each other by the entrance.

Skylar leaned against the wall, clearing his throat like a sickly child. Given his usual demeanor… it felt a bit eerie.

A sickly… pretty boy… um…

Shaking my head to dispel the unsettling thoughts, I turned my gaze toward Fura.

Surprisingly, Fura appeared the most natural. I hadn’t expected her to have any acting skills living like a recluse in the church.

Could her hikikomori nature actually be beneficial?

When she stepped out of the church after 150 years, she just hunched over and stared at the ground timidly.

“I wasn’t really in a position to worry about others.”

What kind of act would I put on?

A bard’s essence is a storyteller, and depending on the tale, they can portray various characters and change their voice.

Unfortunately, I had no talent for imitating voices, and my only attributes were a pretty face and lovely voice.

I had never acted before either.

I limped a little as I walked, and whenever I sensed the gazes of passersby, I immediately turned my head and eyes away to avoid their stares.

Low self-esteem, dislike of attention, and an effort to blend in… the complete opposite of me.

I guess opposites attract, because surprisingly, it was easy to act. I just had to do the opposite of what I usually did.

How long did we walk?

The city was larger than I expected, and I was genuinely starting to tire. As a result, my limp was shifting from an act to reality.

Near the West Gate, I spotted knights patrolling.

‘… Fura, that wasn’t supposed to happen!’

Fura had clearly explained that if they were knights we knew, they wouldn’t be familiar with the city’s structure. However, her prediction was off.

If they were still patrolling, it meant that Fura and Skylar hadn’t been caught.

In other words, we were still safe.

The problem was whether I could remain safe.

Cautiously, I passed by them while keeping an eye on their body language.

Contrary to my concerns, they didn’t pay me any mind.

I looked up at the sky.

Dusk was beginning to fall. Faint black silhouettes loomed between the buildings, and night was creeping in.

There was little time left before the meeting I had agreed upon with Skylar and Fura.

“Wait a minute.”

“……”

Someone called me.

Just when I thought I was in the clear, I heard a knight’s voice from behind. It was a deep, low voice that could send shivers down anyone’s spine.

I rolled my black eyes to look at the knight.

He started walking toward me.

He was wearing an intentionally ragged old cloth draped over his head like a robe, so he couldn’t see my face.

‘Outside of Fura, the church doesn’t really know what we look like.’

Managing the Body Holders had surprisingly many loose ends. The church’s denominations had splintered too much, and Fura belonging to the weakest order likely contributed to that.

I needed a way out of this situation.

“Hey, beggar, stop.”

“… Yes.”

Knights were treated the same as nobles when it came to addressing them.

Strictly speaking, it was a bit different, but a beggar wouldn’t know that difference.

Indeed, his speech had the same air of rudeness one would expect from a noble on first meetings.

Calm down. Even though I was scared, rationally I could easily tell that he wasn’t stopping me because of ‘Fura’.

He was probably just irritated by a beggar passing through.

“Show your face.”

“Yes.”

My face was disguised. My hair was black, and thanks to the Scroll, my eyes were also darkened. I had smeared something charcoal-like on my skin to deliberately make it look filthy.

Even so, I couldn’t hide my beauty, but I wasn’t quite appealing enough for the corrupt clergy who frequented high-end brothels.

The young knight looked like a typical noble with his blonde hair and blue eyes.

He was quite tall, just slightly shorter than Propertyius. Probably around 190 cm? An unusual height for this era.

“Here.”

“… What?”

“Is this your first time accepting kindness from someone?”

I went silent.

The knight placed a silver coin into my hand and rejoined his fellow knights.

What a curious fellow.

… I happened to meet a nice person on the road of travel.

That was about it.

I walked slowly toward the city’s West Gate. My previously limping leg straightened, gradually regaining strength. I no longer needed to act.

***

Once outside the city, what lay before me was an expansive land painted gold by the sunset.

I wanted to ask Skylar what happened to the ‘coachman’, but when I looked around, I couldn’t see Skylar, Fura, or the coachman.

I couldn’t call out their names openly, so all I could do was stand there and wait.

Tap.

Someone poked my back with a finger.

Startled, I turned around to find Skylar disguised as a beggar. He sure knows how to make a dramatic entrance. Can’t he just show up normally?

“You move like a ghost.”

“… Isn’t it strange not to have noticed someone get that close?”

“Is it?”

Skylar, clad in rags, showed a faint smile in response to my statement.

I grinned slightly in return.

We both looked ridiculous.

“Where’s Fura?”

“Over there.”

When I looked closely in the direction Skylar pointed, I saw a faint silhouette of a wagon and a blue dot inside it. When did she get over there?

“Fast, huh?”

“Yeah. She arrived before me.”

“Really?”

Skylar just closed his eyes instead of answering and shrugged his shoulders.

As we walked, I turned around slowly. As we headed toward the wagon, the sunset falling over the city walls cast our shadows long. Calling it a fugitive’s shadow was too peaceful a sight.

As we walked this short distance toward the wagon, just as I was about to climb in…

Fura spoke up.

“… The smell of divinity.”

“Huh?”

“All Body Holders carry a scent of divinity, but yours is even stronger now. What happened? You didn’t use any, did you?”

“No. I met one knight.”

“What?!”

“The knights don’t know our faces. Besides, I was disguised. There’s no need to worry. He even handed me a silver coin, thinking I was a real beggar.”

“…… So the church isn’t completely rotten, huh?”

“Even amidst decayed food, some decent ones always get mixed in.”

I recited a phrase I had read in a book once.

Fura looked at me in disbelief, as if she were surprised.

No matter how often I showed my foolishness, being looked at with such shock made me feel a bit bad.

“Let’s depart.”

“Yeah. Skylar, who’s this coachman?”

“When the situation blew up, I went outside to keep an eye on the West Gate, and I let the coachman who’s been overseeing us know about our situation.”

“Good.”

“… You haven’t forgotten anything, right?”

“… Probably?”

I felt a bit empty.

What was I forgetting?

‘… The cat!’

The cat the emperor assigned as our watcher had disappeared!

With pale faces, Skylar and I began frantically searching the surroundings, and after a long while of searching inside the wagon, not a single hair of the cat turned up.

As we stared blankly at each other, we suddenly turned our attention to the sound of a cat meowing.

< i>Meow.

… It was coming from Fura.

A gray cat peeked out from between Fura’s breasts.

“Ahhh—!”

Fura screamed, and we couldn’t help but revise our evaluations of the emperor’s assigned observer. That cat was definitely… a pervert.