LIGHTNOVELWORLD Chapter 32: 31st entry
Season: Autumn
Weather: scattered red and gold leaves drift slowly down to settle on the brown mottled carpet below, while the fallen nuts are gathered by the small wildlife. The temperature is neither hot nor cold, but there is a chill in the evening air. The weather is beautiful and so are you.
Day of the week: Friday
Date: 15th March, 2024
My dearest Miss Jane Brown,
Are you still so angry with me? After saying you won't write in your journal anymore afraid that I might see it, you really gave it up?
Now that you are back at work, I should return your apartment keys. But I'm afraid. Reluctant. Greedy. I want to spend more time with you and be able to use this as an excuse to make contact with you and have you talk to me.
We work in different departments at work and on different floors so that even if I want to see you, we seldom have the chance anymore. Ever since you've forbidden me from visiting you at home, I can't stop thinking about you. You're with me in my thoughts all day at work and in my dreams at night. Even when we do happen to cross paths, you pretend that you don't know me. It hurts, you know. It really hurts.
Since you are so determined to have nothing to do with me and you have made yourself so clear, I don't want to make you hate me anymore. I only hope that you will find happiness and can be happy. Please be happy.
Even if you decide to choose another man over me in the future, just know that I give you all my best wishes. I only want what is good for you. What is the best for you. Whatever makes you happiest. As long as you are safe, healthy and happy, I will be satisfied.
It's not that I don't respect you. I respect you and love you too much, such that my possessiveness overrides my sensibilities. I feel too much for you. Please don't be scared of me.
So, please forgive me for intruding into your privacy, entering your apartment while you're not home and writing in your journal once more. I really couldn't bring myself to face you to say this farewell.
I'm transferring to a branch company in a different city. I'll give you space. You have my mobile number in case you change your mind. After this week, you will finally no longer have to worry about me seeing you or worry that I might stalk you. I heard some of what you said to your team leader. I'm sorry. I never meant to scare you. I never wanted to harm you, but I brought this upon myself. I may never be able to forgive myself for disrespecting you in this way and ruining any chance that I might have at a relationship with you. I've been too forceful and controlling. I was wrong. I am aware. I just love you too much. I can't tell you how sorry I am.
So here are your apartment keys. You can rest assured that I did not make a copy of them. You can relax now. I'm not going to try to do anything anymore. You've made your decision quite clear through your attitude toward me.
A thousand apologies. I wish you all the best for the future.
Hugs and kisses with deep regret,
Your very not Stony Boss
Anthony Duin